After my happy ending
by hitomi129
Summary: Two people, one secret marriage and a million consequences to come
1. Wedding

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online. This is an AsuCaga

Fanfic and I'm writing it in a form of drabbles

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

_###_

_Today is the day she dies_

Every woman had dreamt of the day when they could finally claim the surname of the person they love

A white flowing dress braised in front of a huge crowd

Maybe Myrna would've cried when she walks down the aisle

"_In richer and for poorer"_

She had wanted to say those statements, at least.

He went back for her with a promise not to let her go

God knows, how she would be incomplete without him

So without any feast that awaits them

Without a crowd to witness them

Without a gown and without a blessing

With only a paper that could mean their whole life

But must remain hidden from now on

And a pen that signify what they were about to commit into

_When amber met his emerald ones…he held her hand so tight_

"_I do"_

_###_

_This is my first try on doing drabbles_

_Although they would follow a sequence and over 100_

_Some would be of drama but the following ones would be funny though_

_READ AND REVIEW: D_


	2. Honeymoon

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online. This is an AsuCaga

Fanfic and I'm writing it in a form of drabbles

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

_###_

White sheets that meant to cover their tangled bodies…

For tonight, she gave herself to him in such lustful yet loving abandon

Kisses that turned to greed compared to those innocent ones they normally shared

He was breaking her piece after piece

And she did nothing but to encourage him more…

She held on to him with so much surrender

Leaving scratch marks on his wake

His figure shadowed over her trembling form…

He eyed her beauty and delved into it once more…

Her hands playing on his midnight hair as he marks her as his

Her weight was now on his chest as he cradled her in his arms…

Chests both heaving in rhythm

Both of them, waiting for the other to speak…

She raised her head, looking up directly on his façade

"This isn't really the right way of getting married, you know"

Her face had that same yearning, very much embedded in his memory

With her cheeks crimson red, just like in the past, just like when he gave her that ring

Although he was slightly taken aback…"Well, I'm sorry"

With the usual expression they both knew so well…

And that was all it took for her to laugh once more…

And him doing it just like her

How pleasant it is, that those words were once again spoken…

With them no longer bound to be apart.

The dawn would mark the end of their tangible dream

Tomorrow, she would face the world of lies and pretend

But only for tonight…

"_Stay with me, Cagalli"_

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_Although they would follow a sequence_

_Some would be of drama but the following ones would be funny though_

_READ AND REVIEW: D_


	3. One Afternoon

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

_###_

"That's enough for today" the admiral gallantly ordered the new trainees to take their break. Respected and educated. The youngest yet greatest admiral Orb has been fortunate to have.

But today, he was at his limit

Maybe he could see her tonight, maybe eat dinner together at his place.

Maybe he could call her later

He wanted to see her.

He had been waiting too long…

"Admiral, there was a girl, claiming that you know her"

Brown wig…Check!

Pink skirt…Ungrateful for but…Check!

Food for _his_ lunch…Check!

Four months…

It has been four months since she got married to the famous Admiral of Orb

Fortunately, their secret has been kept well…

As much as she had wanted to see him today, she knows that meeting him as "Cagalli" could arouse other's suspicions and would definitely gather the media in no more than ten seconds to the military barracks. She had been used to this type of rendezvous and he understood. If they want to meet in public, they meet, not as themselves. Ridiculous but true.

All should have been perfect today aside from the realization that the guard doesn't recognize who she really is and women aren't allowed inside the Military grounds. Well aside from the Princess of Orb, that is.

"_Crap"_

'Her'? He's not expecting anyone today, at least no one he remembers …

He went to glance at the person who had paid him a visit…

"I tried to deny her of entry but she was just too persistent"

And there she was, with her amber orbs brimming with so much reluctance to punch the face of the guard that's pushing her and ordering her to go away. Feisty and hard headed, she would definitely blow off her cover by causing a scene.

"I know her, take your break and leave us" a single statement and they became dogs under his orders

She missed him a lot, she wanted to see him.

At least check if he was tired or had acquired wounds or anything justifiable enough to be a reason for seeing him.

But at the sight of him staring at her with only the two of them, she couldn't understand why she could not look back. The feeling of self-consciousness maybe that was it or maybe it was just the repressed excitement in her by seeing him again after two long weeks.

"What are you doing here?" such caring voice, it made her look at him and again shy away

_Red as a tomato…_

"My-Myr…Myrna, made lunch, and it was too much so-"

_Liar…_

The hand that was shaking suddenly seized with his hand over hers.

there was warmth in them

He reached for the basket as his thumb rubbed one of the numerous band aids plastered on her fingers.

His left hand held the basket of food

But his right held tighter on her hand

"_Let's go have lunch"_

With his smile that she had not seen in quite a while

With her in a dress that he had not seen In quite a while

Today, just got perfect

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_READ AND REVIEW: D_


	4. Unfair and Insecure

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

_###_

_Clearly, they were all staring at him…_

She hated gossips. For her, it's one of those shared activities that girls just love to do every single time of the day but she loathes too much. Everyone in the viewing area, specifically the girls were all being noisy for unproductive reasons. Those sadistic, spoiled daughters of her cabinet members with their flirtatious smiles as they all observe the military march under the heat of the sun.

And then there was her, being forced to sit with them to swallow every word they could utter without a care. Odd woman out, her coat and pants ,that she calls a uniform, would definitely stand out on a populace of frilly skirts and femininely shaded colors.

_They just talk too much._

"Admiral Zala is really handsome, isn't he?"

"I know, he's so charming and smart"

"The only reason, I come with my father is just so I could see him"

One after another, she heard them discuss her _Husband_. He was indeed an attractive man and she knows it very, very well. But she refused to listen to them; no matter how many times in that day they may have said those adjectives to describe him.

_Trust me, I know_

Everyone had a liking on him, especially women her age. She knows those women didn't give a damn about what the other soldiers are doing in the field.

Eyes were all on him.

The old council men watching his competency as a coordinator

And who could miss it…their daughters for their own pleasure.

Every move seen and as creepy it seem, every expression.

"Do you think he has a girlfriend?" came another banter at her back

"Men like him surely has one you know, it would be a waste if he doesn't"

"Do you think, I have a chance?"

"I don't think so; men like him have _high standards_"

And the safety pin just got pulled from her sanity…

"What do you think his girlfriend looks like?"

"Well, for a start she must be _very, very beautiful_"

"And she _wears stylish dresses_…"

What does it really take to be considered worthy him anyway? She's not pretty and she hates dresses as much as she could hate them for talking about her ignorantly and specially for making it clear that she doesn't make the cut.

"…has _class, breeding and even educated_?"

"I bet she loves _make-up_ so that she always looks pretty in front of him" words mixing with those annoying grins and laughter.

Oh how insecurity loves to play with one's mind and linger on her senses.

A statement after the other, she becomes so small, clenching her fists deeper on her thighs. It's like the world is mocking her for being so vocal on her deviated preferences for a girl. Telling her how selfish it was that she couldn't even give any effort on changing for him .So that was it then, all women must be pretty and feminine in front of the person they love. She looked at him, who was so focused training, trying to find answers

_Just one look, and tell me…_

She turned up to be a child, asking him what he has seen in her that made her worthy.

But he didn't, she waited for him to notice, but he just didn't.

She heard those women squeal and stand up from behind, excited about being introduced to the young admiral. One by one she viewed them from afar. They were like a line of charcoal, fueling jealousy more and more as they stood beside him. the sight of him with an elegant woman really does make a difference…

_He was smiling_

And she couldn't take it. She felt humiliated in a way because she doesn't deserve him

Maybe he also was enduring it all this time…not wanting to hurt her feelings and all.

Reality check, no gorgeous coordinator would be stupid enough to pick a woman who doesn't even know how to dress as one and spend his life with her. That would've been a nightmare

"He was really good looking up close…"

"Do you think he's married?"

A new batch of women gathers behind her, once again talking about the same stuff, over and over again.

"I don't think so, if he has one, _she would have been proud_ to show him off and tell the whole world about it"

_He may have been sacrificing far too much…_

And there it was, the last factor about her that was missing…he deserves someone who wouldn't hide him because he was so good for all the right reasons. He was too much and she didn't give back the same weight. She was being unfair, she couldn't be beautiful, wear dresses and make-up and one big factor was, she couldn't even say she's married to him. She just let them talk about him, like she doesn't care but eventually…

"Oh! I would like to meet the lucky wo-"

"Can you just shut it!"

She snapped.

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_READ AND REVIEW: D_


	5. Thin Ice

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

* * *

_###_

"_What were you doing back there?" _Came those, cold, sharp words for the second time in this day.

It was like a penalty…seeing him lean on that doorway with his usual white button down shirt wherein his hands on his pockets and then asking her, what just got on her mind eight hours ago.

The endless chattering of those women finally took a toll and she couldn't help but stand up and just tell them to shut it. All eyes were staring at her at that time, even catching Athrun's attention. She really couldn't think properly but managed to create one lame excuse that she wasn't feeling very well and they were being too loud. She was able to fool them, being a politician that she was, but others who knew her, the real her, knew something was up. Kisaka was the first one to use those lines, and tonight it was Athrun's turn.

"You told everyone you were sick back there, so I paid you a visit"

…

"If you really are, then why don't you stop signing those, and get some sleep"

…

"Cagalli"

She wasn't listening, neither responding. All eyes on those papers, wasn't even caring if she was signing a permit for genocide or what. She just needs to do something, even for a while when he's still around.

"Those were the councilmen you know, what if they think-"

"Screw what they think!"

Everything she was pretending to do, went to a halt

And the first word that came out of her mouth was…a curse.

"What?"

"I said 'screw them'. And their daughters as well…"

She couldn't face him. Everything inside her mind was all messed up and she was this close to breaking down. She refused to see him straight in the eye because he would surely know what she herself couldn't even understand. Why? Because she doesn't want any help. She doesn't want a fix without her even knowing what the problem was.

"What are you talking about?"

"Nothing"

"Nothing?"

"Yes, it was just me… being stupid and…and vulnerable as it always been!"

Every word filled with frustration

She was creating an argument

But he won't have any of it

"Where is this discussion going?"

Always the patient one, he is…

"I told you its nothi-"

"Then could you at atleast act properly on it! because your words are clearly opposed to how you are acting right now and you refused to tell me something that's obviously bothering you"

…but not this time.

"You pulled up a stunt back there, fooled everyone by saying you are sick when, as I see it, you aren't. What was this about? You've been acting weird"

Both of them finally started to burst. Aggravated

She was taking the lead but he was not far behind

She stood up and finally faced him.

"I'll tell you what; I was thinking tha-that maybe…maybe you were better off with someone else"

"What? Who?"

"I don't know! One who has class, dresses well, has make up on all days of the week and could parade you with her arms laced around yours"

She was stuttering, tears threatening to fall

Her movements all over the place, she was pushing him

…to his limits

"What are you trying to say?"

_He got mad…_

_She was trying to push him away, isn't she?_

"That I shouldn't be here with you?"

Colder and colder, he became

Their situation just got weirder, a lot more complicated

"In this world, a lot of women would want to be with you, one who has control unlike me or one who would listen more to what you want."

"What I want? And why would I tell-"

"I don't know!"

When you reach the breaking point, you know you have no more to go…

Then One by one, her tears fell.

After a gap made up of silence, she began to plead

"_-she would have been proud to show him off and tell the whole world about it"_

She just keeps remembering…

"Athrun, What do you want me to become, what do you want me to do? Tell me…please"

"So that you don't have to endure sacrificing anymore, I'll do anything"

She was a mess

He was trying to understand. But he too, couldn't comprehend anything. All he feels now is anger, towards himself for not understanding her and towards her words that sounds like she was shutting him away from her life.

"This is preposterous…"

He grabbed her with so much force

Plundered her lips with his as she tries to retaliate

His arms caging her by the waist while her fists pounded onto him

"Athru-…No!"

He kissed her, but she was nudging like mad. She was forcing him to go away, as he was forcing her lips to pry open. His grips became tighter, as if telling her that she was powerless against him. He towered over her figure with her knees finally giving her away. It was nothing soft and slow. He forced her and she realized there was nothing she could do but surrender. Because the blood on her lips, as a mark of her refusing him to have his way, already started to trickle down.

With his a lips a centimeter away from hers, breathing against each other, he whispered

"I'll see you tomorrow, Goodnight"

He walked out of the room without even looking back; he drove his car with the unusual screech. He was angry because she pushed him too much tonight, and she knows. He was making her open up but she shunned him away like he was nothing.

Athrun was a patient man and Cagalli knew she had hurt him because she saw it in his eyes.

The pain was all her doing…

"Cagalli, your lips are bleeding" Myrna called out her attention when she was left to stare at those windows all alone.

She started to cry…

Pain will eat them both tonight as for dinner

"I know Myrna, and it hurts"

_It really hurts…_

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_READ AND REVIEW: D_


	6. Rain

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

I guess, what I was trying to create is an AsuCaga Fanfic.

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

* * *

_###_

"_Admiral Zala"_

"W-What?"

"We were asking your opinion about creating new Astrays to be sent in Onogoro"

A call to pull him back to reality.

Eyes that all await an answer from him.

While his consciousness sails into nothingness

It had been two days since he left her alone that night. Truth is, he's not even angry at her. No matter how childish she became and no matter how much fit she throws up at him, he would most likely accept it. He was devastated after what happened, nearly getting into an accident when he drove his way home. Clearly they were having a problem. He tried not for them to have one, but she was just persistent. And with no communication and their busy schedules, resolving and talking about it would definitely be impossible for the moment. And here in this meeting at one in the afternoon, very much important for the development of the defense facilities, his mind is completely…

_Blank…_

"I haven't read the report due to time constraints and things that we have yet to consider, I'll inform you as soon as I get to scan it meanwhile, meeting adjourn"

_I don't care…_

He walked out of the room without a care if they were all gawking at him. Surely, it's normal not to read the report, even if it's an apparent sign of feebleness when it should be done for a meeting. Officers have those incidences too…

But not, when it's him…

People in the Military have unconsciously had their expectations on him ever since he got the position of being an Admiral. Politicians have a huge respect for what he can do for Orb. He was the son, of the former president of Plants, graduated in the Military in such a young age and he was one of the heroes from the Second battle in Jachin Due. He was young and full of potential. But today in this meeting, his actions proved that he was just like the others…

Capable of incompetence…

All his appointments cancelled, Hands on the steering wheel, driving beyond the speed limit, He sped back to his condominium. He got tired without even finishing all his duties for the day. It doesn't matter what he tries to do to prevent him from thinking about his personal life, his mind would just tackle that same topic over and over again.

_Drizzle…_

_Rain…_

_Traffic…_

He glanced at both sides and saw a commotion arising at the right. A black car that seems to be familiar had one of its doors open. The Men in black seem to be agitated over something and some of the passers by had taken notice of this. It was one the reasons that cause the traffic that day. With that car being a hindrance to the road, and even attracting busy buddies and reporters resulting into a block on the road.

"Reporters?"

The media has been all over everything that's happening nowadays. Small matter, big scandals, name it. He found a little bit of curiosity on what was happening, but going out and joining in the clamor would surely be idiotic. It was just another day to let slip without anything happening, until his phone…

"Myrna, yes….It's me why?"

"Mister Athrun, It's about the Lady…"

_Red…_

"Cagalli, what about her?"

_Yellow…_

"She's nowhere to be found."

_Green…_

The cars started to move once more. Angry honks at the back of his auto rang aloud. He stared at the black car on his right with its doors open and the men who were still in their disturbing state, dialing their phones to no end.

_That's why it's familiar…_

_It's her car and they were her guards…_

"What do you mean 'nowhere to be found'?" And there he was, with his mind getting blank, voice being higher and his car creating another obstruction on the narrow boulevard.

"Well, I'm not sure but, the bodyguards told me they were on the way to a meeting, and when the car came to a stop, she opened the door and ran away."

"It has been raining hard and Kisaka said they still couldn't find her…"

"I'll go find her, don't worry"

"_Hi, this is Cagalli; I'm busy right now sorry, leave a message okay"_

He was supposed to turn left but went the opposite by reflex. Driving as fast as he could. Searching whatever place he thought she could've gone, cursing, and even going back to that same place where he already searched to no avail. He called her even when he knew it would be awkward talking to her, atleast he knows she's safe. But there was none on the other end of the line…

_Goddamit Cagalli, Where are you?_

"This is Admiral Zala calling, did you find her yet?"

"Sorry, but we haven't caught sight of her yet"

"I see, continue searching and let me know"

"Yes sir"

The rain got heavier as the night approached Orb. People ran as fast as they could creating tiny splatters from puddles of water. Drops of rain settled on his windshield as he finds her without a hint of pausing. He will find her no matter what. Not even knowing where to start and where to end, fatigue was finally catching up. He got tired but was still determined to pull an all-nighter just so he could find her. Huge screens all bear reporters of different faces but with only one news.

"It has been said, that the Princess has been missing since this afternoon, people who have seen her pass by reported that she was last spotted on a-"

Here in this elevator, He didn't find her but he found himself going back to his place. He would be meeting the men in charge of finding her and maybe do some damage control about the media. It was all too frustrating, having a problem with her, two times in a row. He would have to go back and get some files in his place before having yet another attempted chase, pursuit or whatever it's called.

In a prestigious condominium that stood high on the streets of Orb, he lived. The receptionist greeted him with the same smile and he passed by a number of people before entering the elevator his place high up on one of its floors.

The huge glass chandeliers…

The same house keep that he sees at this hour…

The polished hallways…

The Victorian prints on those wallpapers…

The doors that looks the same as the one before it…

The blonde on his doorstep…

And beautiful painting at the end of the hallw-

"What?"

Only a few centimeters to where he stood, He saw a figure with a blonde hair crouching on his doorstep. All disheveled and damp from the rain, she held her knees with those slender arms. Nearer and nearer he went in an overwhelmed state. Seeing her right now is nothing but a miracle for him, a huge pin that got out of his neck. He was getting nervous, as if she would break the moment he touches her. He heard her breathing, seemed to be asleep.

"I'm sorry…for making you wait that long"

He held her cheek in his palm. He was smiling for some reason he doesn't understand. He was more than relieved that he found her, but he was just too happy that he saw her in his doorstep when he was about to lose faith in finding her. Her face looks serene when asleep unlike when she's awake. He wanted to see her amber orbs but held back because he doesn't want her disturbed. He carried her with so much caution and care in his arms; he scanned her form, looking at her necklace that unravel where she placed her wedding ring just like his, kissed her cold lips. Her features melted all his worries away. Surely, they would have to talk about their problem, but for now...

"Goodnight, Cagalli"

...seeing her again is enough.

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_I guess, I'm attempting to show how the both of them tried to get married due to their emotions _

_ without even knowing the responsibilities of a husband to a wife and vice versa_

_and at the same time facing the complications that it would bring. _

_there will be a lot of circumstance wherein they will be subjected _

_and because all they have is love for each other__ when they started this..._

_they must surpass every conflict with love also_

_they are both STUPID in this fic, hahah (please don't kill me)_

_but as they tread the path their stupidity caused_

_They mature more and build a stronger foundation for their relationship _

_HAHAHA...AM I EVEN ALLOWED TO REVEAL THIS? ahahah :)))) _

_READ AND REVIEW: D_


	7. Wake up to bliss

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

* * *

_###_

In the middle of the night, she awakens, sensing his scent from the covers.

Clad on his shirt, that seemed too much for her petite figure, she stood up from the bed trying to find its owner. He was having an affair…

…with his job, that is. She saw him asleep beside the laptop and a huge load of paperwork just like what she has back in her office. She ran away from her busy schedule, so that she could see him. It had been two days of hell for her knowing that they weren't talking and she caused it. Crazy but true, she just realized how stupid it was when she was on the car, on her way to a meeting. And upon realizing, she dashed towards his place, for she knew she had to see him, because she was the one who was wrong.

"Reports say, that the princess Cagalli Yula Attha has already been found and that the whole incident has been a misunderstanding. The speaker cleared that the Princess was transferred to another vehicle and immediately went off to another meeting. And was never lost as previously speculated-"

Turning off the laptop, glancing back at his sleeping face…

"_It looks like you fixed this again, huh"_

_*thud*_

The smell of coffee drowning his senses…

The warmth it emanates waking him from his sleep…

A mug was placed on his table as he opens his eyes only to reveal that one smile he longs for.

"I made Coffee; I hope you don't mind me using the kitchen"

She smiled again…

…for him

And that was how the atmosphere in his slightly dimmed living room became undeniably awkward. They found themselves sitting on opposite sides of the table, with him on the floor and her crouched on the sofa. They weren't talking, just glancing at each other. What a stupid Liaison, they both want to fix things but none of them is getting it started.

"I missed you…"

"How long have you been waiting outside?"

He couldn't help it.

"I don't know, I got here late this afternoon thinking you're here. And then I realized you were also busy and I forgot the key that you gave me so…there you go, I woke up in your bed"

Her eyes were everywhere except at him

At the books stacked neatly…

At the carpet…

At the table…

At the coffee in between her palms…

She spoke in a casual tone, making it seem that there is nothing brewing between them, luring him not to talk about that night when he left her with a bite that sent her lips bleeding.

They could have just reconciled without looking back…but as much as he could, it was inevitable.

"Do you want me to go?"

"No"

"Do _you_ want to go?"

"No"

"Do you want me stay?"

…

"Yes"

"Then why would you push me away?"

His question rushed and aching for an answer.

"Because-…because I want you to be happy"

Her emotions surfaced once more. She was still in pain. He can see it in her eyes, hear it in her voice, and he feels it despite their distance. He felt ashamed for pushing her emotions back. He asked her things that were supposed to be forgotten but he just had to do it, didn't he. He dismissed the discussion and stood up, told to her sleep but…

"Forget it, just sleep and I'll have someone to escor-"

"Did you know what Councilman Sahaku's daughter said back there at the military?"

She held back those tears while both of them gaze at each other's eyes. She couldn't help it; she has to let him know once and for all. Suddenly, it turned out to be a long night for the both of them.

"She said that surely…surely that person you're with must be…be very proud to showcase you in the whole world."

One …

"That she must be beautiful as the dresses she wears"

Two…three…Four…

"Classy, educated and Chairman Maine's daughter agreed with her too…"

Tears just like the rain outside his windows he saw earlier, dropped one by one from her mesmerizing eyes…she bit her lower lip, like a child pulling back on the verge of bawling.

"Hahaha…funny right? How you got was the complete opposite of what you really deserve…"

It was a sarcasm she created, an insult to her self.

His feet finally began to move, bringing him to kneel on her side and breaking the barriers she had created for the both of them. His hands removing the coffee in her hands and replaced it with his. He took a slight glance at their intertwined fingers then looked directly on her crying face.

No more distance…

No more silence…

How his hands felt warmer than the coffee that was previously on hers. A lot more soothing from what an inanimate object could bring.

"You want to be with me and yet you act as if you don't"

"But I have to, for you-"

"I want you for who you are"

His hands held hers tighter and tighter.

"I went back because I wanted to be with you, remember?"

"But we can't tell the whole world about it; this is unfair to us, to you"

"This is the consequence I have come to accept when I asked you to marry me, Orb is my home because you in it, I don't understand why you want to take that away from me"

His words and his emerald orbs made her arms instantly wrap themselves around his neck, the look of him with their wedding ring hanging on his necklace made her remember everything. Sacrifice, fears, happiness, their marriage. It was just a stupid gossip compared to what they have. And she was a fool not to see that from the beginning, thus hurting him and caused a gap between them in the process.

"I'm sorry"

Her tears began to fall once again, as he hugged her back

Wanting to feel her more against him

"I'm sorry, I'm really sorry, don't leave, Athrun"

"Promise, I won't"

"Stay for me"

"I promise, I'll protect you my whole life Cagalli. Everything would be fine. I'm happy the way things are"

She gave a nod and he made her face him, he raises his head as she looks down, staring at her tears, inch by inch bringing their lips together. They paused for air but he tugged her back into another enticing kiss which she complied without any hesitance. The feeling of his lips against her made all the pain she felt disappear. It was a kiss that was soft and unhurried, creating those imaginary butterflies on her stomach. Maybe they were true after all.

_What I have here in my arms is a diamond in the rough_

Another kiss and both lay in bed that night. With her still clad in his oversized shirt, all curled up in his arms against his chest. The mugs were all forgotten in the living room when he carried her to bed with him to sleep. He can smell her scent from her hair and she was looking at the Haumea necklace she had given him. The pendant was still intact but ring beside it brought remarkable happiness in her. It would have been a great honor to become the princess or admiral of a whole country. But here in this bed, sleeping together, as husband and wife would normally do, is an irreplaceable privilege they wouldn't miss. Here they don't have to pretend. They don't have to be someone else.

…

"Athrun, how did I get into your shirt?"

_One Innocent question_

His calm and happy trip to dreamland, disrupted

"Uhmm…you know I-"

"Did you call for a maid, to change my clothes?"

"I…I...You could get sick because your clothes got soaked so I -"

"I just hope that wouldn't tell the media about this..."

"No, that w-wouldn't be happening c-cause..."

"Why are you stuttering all of a sudden?"

Then he finally declared…

"I did it"

_His cheeks would've been shaded with pink by now, how lucky he was that her head was cradled on his chest so she couldn't see him eye to eye blushing. She can see his ears turning red though._

He always makes her blush…why can't she?

She gave out a laugh and he realized she was playing with him

He held her tighter and so did she as they drifted to sleep.

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_READ AND REVIEW: D_


	8. Tricking loneliness

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

* * *

_###_

He was leaving her…

To go to Plants….

There are things that are out of people's control. Somehow, sending someone away really is a difficult task for anyone, especially if it's someone you love. It wasn't permanent though, just for three weeks or so. Kisaka's recommendation made him represent orb on one of the Unitarian summit and military cooperation to be held in Plants.

The colonel said he was a coordinator, he was the best choice.

Without any questions, he accepted it anyway

Without any retaliation, she was sending him away

Again…

"I'm going now"

"Okay, take care"

The least that she could is say goodbye; maybe give a smile for good luck…

But she couldn't.

For it was the same spot where he left her two years ago, the same luggage that he used, the same transporter. Who knows, it may even be the same pilot as much as irony would take it. It just reeks out the memories that induce fear when thought about…

_He's not coming back…_

"I'm coming back you know"

In a light mood, came his voice. He was stating the obvious, something she already knows but he still insisted on saying. Because he senses her fears, she wasn't the only one who grasped the painful memories and wasn't the only person who wanted it alleviated. He did too. She raised her head when she heard him, the fidgeting of fingers that she had been doing to decrease eye contact came to a stop.

"I know"

"Really, then why do you look sad?"

She tried to reassure him, but her face gave her away.

"Sad, W-what are talking about? Me sad? No…"

"Oh really, I guess I must the only one who feels it then…"

_I don't want to go…_

His face was a mirror of how it felt like to be in her shoes as of this moment. Both felt the sadness of being apart and the fear of something unknown.

_I don't want you to go…_

"I'm scared"

She finally admitted, for there was no use in denying it anyway.

Yet…He couldn't do anything about it.

"Of what?"

"Of you"

"Me?"

"Of you, not coming back to Orb…to _me"_

Suddenly, words that came out of fear were the very words that gave him relief. She was creating a home for him. A place where he must come back, where she awaits for his return. He pulled her in his arms encircling her by the waist. He was laughing, she heard it, and eventually got annoyed. It was so frustrating that in these sad moments, he managed to give out a laugh from nowhere after she blurts out her emotions.

"What the-, is this even funny to you?"

"Hahaha…sorry, sorry. I'll stop now okay"

"Stupid"

"I was just thinking"

"Of what?"

"Of what would you look like after three weeks of waiting?"

"What? That's not even important!"

"Yes it is, you'll _wait_ for me don't you"

"_So that's what he meant"_

"O-of…Of course I will, Idiot"

Her red cheeks were surely a sight to see…

"What do you want me, to bring back from Plants?"

"Do you want a Kebab?"

_How random could they be in these circumstances?_

_Teasing when they were about to say goodbye…_

"You're stupid Athrun; I'm not a child and I don't want anything "

"Just come back"

With another sigh in surrender to this idiosynchrasy, she hugged him back.

In a single moment, ad midst the uncertainty…

They both felt safe.

"I still don't understand why Kisaka won't let me go with you. After all, isn't the Chief of Orb important on that summit?"

"He told me you're scheduled on a special meeting next week so you couldn't go to Plants"

"Meeting? A special one? I'm not informed of that!"

"Oh, maybe they'll let you know by tomorrow. I also have no clue on what is it"

"Okay then. But what could it even be"

The transporter was finally ready to go. The pilot was waving at him…

She just can't...

"I'm really going now"

She held on his jacket. She was trying to say something but doesn't even know where to start. It's clear that she couldn't just order him not to go. But it really aches more and more as he creates the distance from their embrace. She kept silent but she didn't let go

"Cagalli"

"Huh?"

_What's he even going to say now…_

His lips rested on hers taking her by surprise. His lips were warm compared to her trembling ones. His arms laced itself back on her waist as she clutches more on his jacket. More and more she wanted to stay like this. In his arms and making the whole world stop for even just a minute. Her released her clasp and cupped his face while he pulls her more in him.

"Take care and don't stress out"

"I will"

"And you…Don't try to get married to someone else now"

"What?"

"I told you, not to get married while I'm away"

He was pretending to feel threatened. And knowing how argumentative she was,

she acted like an angry child about it

he saw it coming though...

"That's not going to happen again and I told you-"

"I know"

_Of course he knows. He trusts her_

_The way he looked at her told her so_

His smile became the assurance that she needs.

It was just another bout of humor to dismiss any negative thought and feelings

Replacing them with the better memories that do not end with goodbye

but with that light whisper of…

"Why would I get married again, when I already am?"

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_READ AND REVIEW: D_


	9. Colors of Betrayal

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

* * *

_###_

Today marks the first week since his departure to Plants. He tried his best to call her everyday but despite that, trying to live and getting over each day seems to become harder the more that the number of days tends to increase. She has been keeping herself busy for the past few days. She would often create an excuse that she was just like that but truth is, it was just one of her tactics to forget his absence, to prolong the surging sadness. He must have been feeling the same way…

Morning turned to nights…

Dawns changing into daybreaks…

_Two more weeks..._

Waiting is just too agonizing and excruciating for both of them.

"Cagalli, do you have time?" a knock came from the door

"Oh, Kisaka, sure come in"

_The usual smile_

"I see, you haven't been spending your break"

"You know me, I have lots to do. If I miss one, tomorrow's meeting is going to be a problem

_A simple conversation…_

"I see, but I heard from Myrna, you haven't been getting enough sleep for three days now"

He could see it. The bags under her eyes tell the whole story of staying up late at night. The dark shades under her amber orbs make it very noticeable that she was not sleeping properly under unknown circumstances he has yet to discover.

_Or maybe he already knows_

"Oh, Myrna told you, I was waiting for Athrun to call. You see, there's seems to be a time difference in Orb and In Plants. His meetings were scheduled in the mornings and during Thursdays; their mornings are nights in Orb. You know, he told me the-"

"Cagalli" he called her name the second time today.

But there was something different with his voice that cut her words

And it surely caught her attention. and she waited for him to continue...

"I came here to talk to you about something important"

_Something important…?_

"Sure! and…what might that be? Oh! Which reminds me, Athrun said you scheduled me for a special meeting. My secretary said there was, but you have to inform me personally"

...

"It's about the President of Scandinavia and his son."

He started with words she knew where would end…

She didn't saw that coming…for it came out all of a sudden

She shouldn't have asked…

Roy Meitner, the eldest son of the President of Scandinavia. He was a bachelor, one that is sought for by many women. She met him once on one of his Father's victory Parties for being the first president ever since the country changed its constitution.

It was just a smile and hello for her…

_Nothing special_

But for him…

"I told you to dismiss that topic of getting engaged with him didn't I?"

She was clear on her declaration. She doesn't want him.

"He's a fine man"

"I don't care!"

What an irritating topic they delved upon, that she couldn't help but shout at the very person who had been the father figure for her since the death of the previous.

"You are scheduled to meet him and so are the other lads who have the opportunity of being your husband. It's to happen at Burge Hotel this coming Wednesday in the afternoon"

"What? W-who…who's responsible for this?"

"The council did. With my help that is"

One by one, pieces of paper that was meant to be signed came crashing down the carpeted floors under her desk

She stood up due to confusion.

Trembled in shock…

Shuddered from frustration.

He was trying to gain control over her life. And the most exasperating part was, he knew very well, of her relationship with the Admiral.

"So that was why you sent him back to Plants. When you said special meeting you meant-"

_Pieces of the puzzle forming to reveal the answer…_

"Don't worry. They're all noble men who take pride and dignity for what they do for their own country. You'll certainly learn to like one of them"

_He doesn't care, does he?_

"Why are you doing this?"

"For you" he declared

"Liar, for me? Or _for Orb_?"

_She doesn't want to judge him. for he would be the last person that she would doubt._

He turned up to be her father when Uzumi Nara Attha resigned himself to the consequence of protecting his country. He was the one who supported her in everything. But what did just happen? In a single flick he became a cold hearted man who stood before her. Those men he spoke of weren't just boys next door who go to school and play ball. They were sons of powerful men who took a liking for her and _her position_.

He eyed her and declared…

"Seeing that you understand, I need not explain everything"

"And Athrun?"

_She was hoping…_

…_for a better answer._

"End it"

"What?"

_It just became worse…_

"It's time you both finally grow up…"

"You assigned him as my bodyguard in the past"

"And a Guard he must only be, not your lover Cagalli!"

"Why are you saying this? You even saved his life remember?"

"Sad to say, seeing how you and him are being attached to each other. I regret doing that"

His words were daggers sinking in each syllable. She was about to break down when the crew told her that Athrun Zala controlled a GINN that got shot down by the Destiny Gundam. But Kisaka saved him and they were together now. And now he wanted their relationship to end?

"Is this a joke? Because I don't find this one bit funny!"

"He's a coordinator Cagalli, he doesn't belong here! I may have known your relationship but this game of yours has finally taken too long"

"Who are you to say that?"

…

_In her office, behind that closed door, two people were shouting at each other._

_A knock started it all, one tried to retaliate while the other was just selfish _

_but it will all end..._

_with one of them in despair_

_Guess who would it be…_

"You are the Princess of Orb and you must go because it is your duty"

"I won't"

_"I'm married. but I can't tell him"_

He doesn't care what her reply would be, because she would do as she was told. She would be married to another man and it will not be Athrun Zala. He wanted their relationship to end and it was the truth. He may have been knowledgeable about it but he doesn't approve of it and neither will be the council once they become aware of it.

He was about to take his leave…

"Kisaka!"

"What if…What if I say… that Athrun and I are already married?"

It was a secret they've been meaning to hide a little bit longer but if that's what it would take for him to stop this absurd plan of her getting engage into some royal stranger, then so be it.

"That's a lie, you should never utter once again, Cagalli, because…"

His face could no longer be seen as he opened the door.

"Even if I saved his life once…I would kill him, if it's true"

"And I mean it"

He shut the door. She was left alone with a single thought in mind…

_"Please wake me up from this nightmare..."_

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_READ AND REVIEW: D_


	10. Just another Goodnight

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

_###_

* * *

"I also have a meeting tomorrow and…"

She held the phone, listening to his voice as he talks about his day. He told her he had a lot of meeting and a lot of files to review. He was calling a lot more since yesterday, trying to catch up on what he had missed about her life. But despite his efforts, who knew that there would be a slip that he failed to be aware of.

_Even if I saved his life once…I would kill him, if it's true_

His threat still echoed in her mind. The mere thought of Kisaka not accepting their relationship was a slit on her neck making her bleed in pain more and more. She couldn't think right at all. She thought that he would be happy for them but…

_She was wrong…_

"I see"

"And I also conversed with Kira the other day at Aprilius. He was testing the new XG-203 and the new Petrie class. They have been quite busy here too"

"Oh really…"

She was just trailing after whatever he says

Using words that could express that she hears him even though nothing's imprinting on her mind. God knows how she tried her best to pretend there's nothing wrong going on, praying that he wouldn't notice…

"I'm serious Cagalli, if you want anything just say it okay. I'll bring you something when I get back"

"Hmm, yeah maybe…"

After her discussion with Kisaka, the last thing she wanted to hear was the phone ringing and revealing that Athrun was on the other end.

"_I wanted to see you right now"_

"_Athrun, come home…"_

"_Please, save me"_

She wanted to run to him. Tell her about how painful it is to be powerless and alone. Hearing his cheerful voice right now, tears her even more. It aches to hear the voice of the person she cherish the most knowing that he isn't aware about the possibility of them being separated soon.

"No. I don't want anything"

"Are you sure?"

"Yup, sure"

…

"Cagalli?"

"What?"

"Tell me, Are you okay?"

His voice bearing the sound of suspicion.

She wanted to tell him the truth because he promised that everything would be fine. But nothing's going their way isn't it. She was left with nothing but a phone in hand, bathing in the coldness of the air coming from the balcony while holding back her tears as she lies in bed.

"Huh?"

A tear made its way on her left cheek

"_I'm not Athrun, I'm not"_

"Is everything okay? You don't reply to me as you always do"

…

"Cagalli, Are you still there?"

…

Oh Haumea, and in why would this moments does he have to be smart?

The tears suddenly fell one after the other. The pain grew even more as she felt an opening that she could tell him what was happening. But the opportunity just made her struggle even more. He was reaching out to her because he will definitely save her. But she knew that if she grabbed his hand the weight of the burden that she carries right now will catch up on them. She couldn't afford to make him suffer.

She had her palm on her lips preventing him to hear her cries.

"Y-yes…I-I'm still he...re"

"Are you okay?"

"Yes"

_She lied …_

"Did…did you manage to… see your friend's grave?"

"Yeah I did yesterday"

_Her intonations turning uglier by the minute…_

_Her voice was trembling and she couldn't control it…_

_She broke down and he didn't know_

"Cagalli"

"What?"

"Could you show me your face on the monitor? I haven't seen you in a week now so…"

"I can't"

His face would have been red right now. This was one of those moments when both of them would be shy as teenagers do because the thought of saying you want to see the face of the person you want is the same as saying I love you. But she denied him that and it left him in awe.

"_I'm sorry, if you see me right now you would know the truth and if I see yours…I might forget my responsibilities"_

"I-I have eye bags you know…That's right…Eye bags"

She heard him sigh on the other end, sensing his relief.

"Oh I see, but I'm not really concerned with what you have on your face I just want to…to…to see you, that's all"

"You know, you were the one who told me about your thoughts on what would I look like after three weeks. It's only been a week so wait a little bit more"

"Well that's-"

"That's what?"

"Well okay…"

_She could hear his childish voice, in surrender._

"Hahaha…I was just tired on a busy schedule that's why I got these under my eyes. No need to worry"

She found amusement in him. For a while, it's a mystery on how he could make her forget without even knowing that she was suffering. Maybe that's why they married in secret, in the first place. He was the only joy in the world that she would claim as hers. But unfortunately, that only joy was one of the many things she's not allowed to have and to be with.

"I'll say. I'm just glad that after two weeks more, I would be back in Orb. With you"

His words made her heart skip a beat but pushed her mind further in despair…

In two weeks more. She would already have a fiancé and she would have to face him by then. Everything would change and she would see him suffer as he blames himself for not being there for her. They would have to be separated in the end. Because it was clear now, that the truth about their marriage was something nobody would accept.

"Yeah"

"I think you should rest now. Cagalli"

"Okay, do you best there"

"I will"

He was about to hang up when he heard her call his name…

"Athrun!"

"Hmm?"

"C-Could you…show me your face?"

"_Just one, please grant me this one selfish request"_

"What? You told me you can't and you wanted to see mine?"

_She wanted to see him, no matter what. If she might forget everything, then so be it. Because his was the face that would look at her straight in the eye, his was the eyes that reflected her face on them, his was those lips that would kiss her and tell her he wants to be beside her. _

"Please"

"Oh, well…"

That night before she went to sleep, she saw his face on the screen and saw the redness in his face. Maybe he wasn't used to the idea of her looking at him using a video transmitter. Too bad he couldn't see her smiling face.

"There, you've seen me now. Just for five seconds okay?"

It was a stupid sight to see her kissing the monitor itself but…

She did.

She didn't bid him goodbye, never told him what she did in front of the screen nor tell him 'I love you'. She poured her heart out in those last words she told him over the phone…

"Good night"

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_READ AND REVIEW: D_


	11. Royal Strangers

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

* * *

_###_

Burge hotel, one of the finest hotels built in Orb. Every known Celebrity and Politician often takes their time in residing in such location. It's a luxury that only those rich and powerful who can only afford. She may have been one of those categories but she never took a liking on wasting money for such extravagance. And today she would hate it even more.

"This place is famous for their Prosciotto Wrapped Scallops and Blackberry Verbena"

"I see"

"But I don't supposed you took a liking for such cuisines"

"So you knew, huh"

The place reeks of every whimsical-money-wasting thing she hates. The chandeliers' light are too bright, the violin sounded like screech in her ears, the wine tastes like bitter medicine on her palate, the tiny piece of seafood looked more of a decoration than a food on such a big plate…

They made her wear a dress…

…and she hates this man the most.

"Mr. Meitner…"

"Roy, you could call me Roy"

"_Well_ then, Mr. Roy could we…set the meaningless talks aside and-"

"Meaningless? Forgive me, Lady Cagalli-"

"It's Attha, I believe that in protocol, you call me by my last name"

…

"I see then, forgive me but I'm simply trying to get to know you, _Lady Attha_"

_Getting to know her more…?_

The man in front of her was the fifth and last gent whom she dined with, this afternoon. They were all dignified and well-mannered men but it irks her to a greater extent whenever they start talking like they were her husband to be. And that line that he spoke of was the same idiotic statement she had been hearing since she sat with the first lad today.

"_I bet he'll be happy to know that I could punch a guy and carry a shotgun"_

"What is there to know?"

"I don't know, why don't we start with the type of food you prefer to eat"

_Donell Kebab with chili sauce…_

"I'm not that picky, I just don't want eating in these types of places"

"I see"

…

_She caught him staring…_

"It's rude to stare you know"

"I'm sorry; it's just that I get mesmerized by your eyes every time I look at them"

"What?"

"I don't think you remember but…we've met once on my Father's party and your eyes really caught my attention"

She suddenly felt awkward on his statement. She doesn't like guys who sounded like a flirt and much more when they speak like they know her. He caught her off guard on his statement. But she definitely had enough absurdity for today up until tomorrow and she wouldn't let him add up to that.

"Do you intend to discuss about my eyes and other body parts during this conversation? Because I'm telling you, you'll run out of praises in just two minutes"

"Hahaha, I see you've had enough of men talking about you…"

What a proud man he is, as he senses that thick air between them and yet he pretends they were having a good time.

"Okay then. Why don't you ask a question and I'll answer the best that I can"

_This is a waste of time…_

Clearly, this was just a waste of time for her. She wanted to go home and just be with that bunch of files and braise under the silence they have yet to offer her. Rather than sit in a pit hole, and pretend that she was some damsel who ran out of princes that would save her. She could just walk away right now. After all, there was no media to cover such rubbish today, but she wouldn't because it's the norm.

She looked at him straight and the eye…

"Why do want to get married to me"

"That's easy. For one, you're very beautiful"

"_Just shut up"_

"And it's a mutual benefit for our countries"

"Right…convenience huh?"

…

"You seem to find my words as an insult but that is the truth and I want to know your opinion about my proposal"

"_I'm not a trophy"_

Everything he said was an insult to her. Maybe his ego didn't mean it but the words have died to ridicule her. He wanted her for reasons as shallow as those. There was nothing to it except for fame and power. He was just the same as her purple headed baboon-of-a-Fiancé who had died, only that, this man had ash gray hair, smarter, less spoiled and had his aspirations set straight.

"Don't you find it one bit senseless…?"

"On what degree?"

"Everything that you said is stupid, a waste of time for living. You get to live a hundred years and you spend it with a stranger?"

It was now her turn to catch him off guard. He became silent after her blunt reply…

"Hahaha…you're amusing my Lady. I'm glad that I got the chance to…_know you_."

"Huh?"

…his revelation would turn the tables around.

"I've done some _research_ about your profile and I guess that you're still fighting for your rumored love affair with a certain coordinator"

"_He knew? How?"_

"_What if he knew about the Marriage?"_

_Her eyes wide open_

Never mind him telling her how he wanted to marry her for her position in Orb. This one statement he just said would mark the end of her enduring patience.

"Although, I haven't known who he was and may not be able to see him in person though"

"I don't care what you believe in but hiring someone to search the life of another is rude and is without a doubt unethical for my liking"

"Let me go…"

He placed a hand over hers as she took a sip on that dull red wine she hated. She hated it when other people touched her and she hates his guts to begin with. She swears…

"No"

"You're not being a gentle man, I said let go."

"Marry me, then."

"No"

…The moment he manages to let go of her right hand she would definitely hit some senses in him. She was running out of patience and he was being a power-craved lunatic. All this time she had been hearing the same answer. They wanted her for her beauty and power in society and she was getting fed up. She was about to pull her hand violently when…

"Excuse me, but I believe it's my turn to speak with lady Cagalli"

_She heard a man's voice coming from behind. Here we go again. Another royal stranger that would surely face the anger that the previous had made._

"Oh really, but I was made aware that I'm the last one"

"Sorry, but you have been misinformed then. If you want I could confirm it with your secretary"

She never cared to look at the man behind her. All she wanted was to get passed through the day and wait for Athrun to come back. The man in front of her let go of her and she was thankful that he was already leaving.

"Never mind. I guess, I'll be seeing you again my princess…"

"_Just go back to where you came from"_

"Oh, I wouldn't count on that."

…

She answered back as he took a glance at the man behind her.

"Oh and Mister, you shouldn't address the lady by her first name. It's by _protocol_ you know"

She watched him leave and got lost in thought about the man being arrogant in a certain way that she refuses to be related to him. He wanted nothing but power and a harem of beautiful women. He was ambitious and would not back down. But she doesn't care about anything, not anymore, to the extent of not caring about the man who now seated in front of her.

"_Oh! Well, let's get this stupid dating session over with so that I can go home"_

"So, may I know your-"

She turned her gaze to him. But…

* * *

_###_

_CLIFF CHAP! Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_For those asking for Ice and Dark I'm updating this week promise…:D_

_READ AND REVIEW: D_


	12. Complicating compliments

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

* * *

_###_

_The rain started to fall…tainting the glass with those tiny beads it bears._

"What are you doing here?"

"I'll have the Scallops and the blackberry verbena"

He just kept on moving…handing the menu back to the lady whom she couldn't care less. She saw his features the moment she laid her eyes on him. Scolding herself for not realizing his voice a while ago, if she had conceived it was him then her eyes wouldn't be gawking with disbelief, her body wouldn't suddenly become stiff. She wasn't even sure whether she was breathing or not. The whole world could collapse right now for all she cares. All that matters is that, He came back.

"Don't you know that those are the cuisines this place is famous for?"

"Funny how you were the second person who said that and I still don't care"

"I see…"

"I asked you a question, what are you doing here?"

He created a casual entry, always calm and unhurried and yet,

She reciprocated with indifference. Talking as if he was a stranger, asking as if he meant nothing to her.

"I believe I scheduled an appointment with you"

"Sorry but that's not the answer I was looking for. How long have you known about this?"

"Since I arrived in Plants"

Was he playing with her? Since he arrived in Plants? He already knew it a week before and yet he didn't even tell her. They were always laughing on the phone, talking like there's no tomorrow and it seemed like there never really was a problem. Does he even know the feeling of carrying a huge sack of burden on her shoulders? On how does it feel to talk to him while being unable to tell him her suffering?

"Since you arrived? And yet…and you didn't even tell me?"

"_How uncaring could this person be?"_

"Now I know why you don't care. This doesn't really taste like a kebab"

"Are you saying I can't eat gourmet cuisines on a five star hotel?"

Clearly, she was beginning to think that him trying to get her pissed off wasn't a coincidence. He intends to do so. And he might be successful this time.

"No, what I'm saying is. You're not the type of person to indulge on such extravagance. I prefer you being that way. You're not afraid to tell people what you don't like."

"What?"

She couldn't believe what he was trying to do to her. One moment he was measuring her patience and now, he was completely complementing her. But she remembered, he had always been like that. He notices things about her that she ignores or often fails to see. He told her once about all her positive attributes and she remembered how she felt happy about it. Not because someone just praised her but for the reason that she realized he was always looking at her. Although she didn't tell him how happy she was that day, for it definitely would be embarrassing for her to admit. And whenever he attempts to do it…

"Well, It's seems pretty obvious now that you ditched work. Care to even tell me how you made that even possible? Admiral Zala."

…she would just divert it to another topic. Because if he kept further, he would definitely notice those red tinge changing the color of her cheeks.

More and more…his smile grew

"Hahaha sorry, I guess I couldn't help checking and seeing what you would look like after three weeks because you denied me the opportunity when I asked you on the phone"

"And contrary to one's belief. It's possible. I asked Commander Archiene to cover for me and just send me the files back to Orb. I told him I would be needing you to read those and as compensation for him doing my work, I'd have to do his here in Orb"

"You realize that you just ordered a commander didn't you?"

"More like asked a favor since he was my father's friend but never mind that. I, doing his work here would cost a whole month, combined with my duties as well"

"_Such unbelievable thing to do…"_

"And for what reason, rational enough, would you be doing that kind of thing?"

She made a face that looked like she saw a pig fly in between them when he just smiled at the look on her face.

He was never a stupid person. All positive adjectives would always apply to him but stupid would never be attached to his name. She saw him as a rational man, capable of logic and playing by the rules. But what he just said made her think twice on what images she had of him. He risked his time and duties just so he could shorten his stay in Plants? What was he even gambling for? Her?

"_Is he an idiot?"_

"Well it would be a month and doubled load of papers but…"

Even though she hates to admit it but, she becomes weak under his stares. Making her stare anywhere except back at him, start fiddling her fingers as he presses his elbows on those sheets and inched his face nearer to emphasize what he has been doing.

"Seeing you in a dress, made things worth it"

"_If I ask him, I wonder what he would tell me"_

He did it for her. He always did, even though she's capable of discerning it or not. She fears the day that they would be apart. The very thought of it would make her cry. Whenever she looks at him she always had this wringing question in her mind that only he could answer. Maybe today was the day that she could ask him. Going by the flow of what was already happening with him participating ridiculously on a dating session, she clearly had no idea of.

"Athrun…"

He sensed the hesitation as he waits.

"Athrun…why do want to get married with me?"

Maybe he'll answer the same thing as what those spoiled rich men had told her a while ago. He'll definitely say she was beautiful and is the princess of Orb. But she doesn't want that. Deep inside, she doesn't know the perfect answer to her question. But she had to ask him. Because she was giving him the right, the right to decide whether to make her happy or devastated. She was putting her emotions in his hands, and why? Because she fell in love that hard that she fears, she could leave everything just to be with him. To the point that if he asks her to leave Orb…maybe she could.

"I don't know…"

"Huh?"

"I'm afraid I have to tell you this but…I'm already _married"_

"Really? then would you care to tell me, the reasons of why you married _her_?

Again…they decided to act like strangers.

He started it, and then she played along.

"Well, she gets easily pissed off about almost everything. She doesn't take a break even though she needs one and she is a handful you know… I told her not to do one thing and that's the first thing she does after I Leave""

"I'm not like that…!"

"I-I mean maybe…maybe she's not like that"

They were playing a game of pretend but…clearly; she doesn't have a chance of winning.

"_Stop smiling like that. Athrun you idiot"_

"Oh no, she had always been like that since. She doesn't like wearing dresses neither will she put on any make-up but for me…"

...

"Everything about her is enough. She's kind and puts others first. No matter how hard it was she would always fight for what she believes in. she carries a gun but she wouldn't kill anybody. And to think, she values my life more than I do. I wanted to stay by her side, to know her more…to be there when she needs me. To-"

"Stop!"

His words sparked two things inside of her...for one,

Forgiveness is what she wanted. But the moment she got it….

…every word burned her with guilt. His smiling face was something she doesn't want to see or even look at. How she had wished for him to get mad. To punch the man who just made an attempt to steal his wife. Scold her and threaten her that he would leave her and make her beg. It's amazing how watching a lot of dramas could do on one's imagination but it was the only way she could feel repentance. The least he could do was to shout at her, but he just sat there and smiled. And she found it unfair…

For her, because she kept what she thought was something he didn't know. Only to find out he was two steps in front of her.

And for him, because he just got stabbed at the back but he was pushed to just accept all of them. He trusted her, she broke her promise and yet, he remained unshaken.

_This is the consequence I have come to accept when I asked you to marry me_…

"_But how much more could you take?"_

…

"I don't want to hear this anymore"

She screamed, stood up and caused a scene. She ran outside with him following from behind and never got to finish his food. The other guests were all staring at them; the music came to a halt. More and more whispers about them a having a lover's quarrel was beginning to rise among the crowd. For Pete's sake, the waitress was even in front of them.

"_And now for the Orb weather report, a low pressure area has been detected here in the western area so be sure to bring out your umbrellas and coats with __you…"_

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_For those asking for Ice and Dark I'm updating this week promise…: D_

_READ AND REVIEW: D_


	13. Sleepless

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

_###_

* * *

"Cagalli!"

The rain fell heavy towards her skin. Her dress was damp and her make-up was as good as smothered. It's not even twelve o'clock and yet, Cinderella is already on the run. With no destination, without any reason, her feet carried her anywhere away from him. When people find it already boring to play pretend, these two people decided to play tag. She walks away, he chases her, as simple as that.

Even though eventually, both of them ended up in an alleyway. Because despite the overflowing emotions, she knew that he'll definitely catch up. But beneath the childish game that they seem to indulge into, there seems to be that pit of guilt that grows deep inside her which she has yet to reveal.

"Why…why do you always make it look like it's okay?"

She faced him uncaring about her disheveled feature.

The tears pretending to be raindrops. Raindrops mingling with the tears on her face.

"Why don't you get mad even for just a tiny bit? And Blame me for doing this stupid thing behind your back!"

He gave her the time, waiting for the right moment…

He was just looking at her as she thrashes her arms and shouts at him.

"Tell me you're mad, tell me I'm weak and you don't trust me anymore!"

"Say that you can't stand this anymore and regret…regret…"

She wants him to say those words. But her heart doesn't want to listen to it. She wanted him to choose the consequence of her actions. But she fears that the one he would choose would be to leave her.

Every moment her voice grows weaker in surrender. She knows that he doesn't deserve to be shouted at. Not when he was the victim in this whole situation. His calm demeanor was starting to fall apart. His face became more unreadable as she utters those words. Facing reality sure is hard even though you understand everything. Sometimes, it wouldn't matter if you have the courage to face it because eventually, everything would come down…

"I'm sorry; I'm not that strong."

"I'm sorry that I can't protect this relationship like you do"

"I...I'm sorry because I fear too much about you and about Orb-"

…

"Then, what would happen if I said those words?"

"Huh?"

…with his well-made facade cracking up.

He got nearer to where she stood, making their distance disappear. She got scared the moment he grabbed her wrist, dragged her body to the wall and cornered her. His face was inches away from her and her face was reflected in his glares, making her feel more terrified. His expression had a seriousness that she had never seen as he punched the wall beside her head. Instantly she felt the anger that he had been repressing all this time. She felt she couldn't do anything. And suddenly it was now her turn to stand there and wait for him to speak…

"Tell me, what would happen if I told you right now that I was mad at you?"

"Didn't you felt it? How hard it was to know about something that could tear us apart but I can't even tell you for a week?"

"_I may have kept it for two days, but it must have been harder for him"_

"To keep it inside for a week and speak to you as if nothing's wrong. Hear you laugh and pretend not to know that you're crying on the other end of the line"

"_He knew, he knew I was crying and I didn't know what he felt"_

"You want me to say, that I will leave you for doing this. When the truth is, I can't"

"_Look closer Cagalli, the expression in his eyes was not anger at all but... Maybe he was also…"_

"I crumble into pieces, just by the thought of you marrying another. I told you that in the past"

"Now tell me, what would it bring if I-"

The coldness he felt suddenly turned into warmth as her palms cupped his face.

"…_Scared_"

On a spur of the moment, she realized that his fears were the same as hers. To be anywhere without him, to not be able to see each other anymore, to be forced to be with someone else and to be powerless to do anything about it.

Her arms encircled his neck turning the touch into an embrace…

She whispered on his ear, feeling his shiver fading a little bit…

"I want only you, Athrun. Please don't doubt what I feel for you."

"Cagalli…"

He began to hug her back, tighter. As if he'd lose her the moment he loosens one bit.

"Thank you, for being strong. You…didn't want me to panic, right? That's why you don't have to shoulder everything anymore. You were always trying to protect me but we're together now so, let's share half the burden. I'm sorry Athrun, so please don't say you regret being with me…"

"Never"

All her emotions came crashing down…

And he was always there, waiting to catch her fall…

She began to feel everything was being replaced. Shouts turning into cries, anger turning into calm. If they had been true to themselves and did not resolve to pretend maybe there wouldn't be a need for them to be in this alleyway. If she just told him she missed him, the moment she saw him sit in that chair, both of them wouldn't be soaked under the rain. But in the end, it all felt so good. With the rain falling, the sounds of rushed steps, without anyone knowing that they had been kissing in that narrow space.

"_Let's go home…"_

…

That night, she decided to share the same bed with him. The tension between them already subsided but that whim of selfishness to be with him was eating her up. She may have tempted him but he grabbed hold of it the moment she offered it. Their clothes fell on the floor one by one. She felt the awkwardness of initiating such and found her fingers struggling to remove his buttons but…

He patiently waited.

He carried her in his arms and eased her in bed. His form hovered over her, helpless on how he couldn't take away his eyes off her. He can see the pooling tears in her eyes as she involuntarily curves her body after feeling the vulnerability she was in. she was not scared at all because it wasn't even the first that they did it but it was based on reflex and she couldn't do anything about it.

She reached out to him. Teasing and enticing him. Everything that she did was an assurance of her presence in this room. That he is not alone and how she wanted that desire that was burning inside him. He made his mark from her lips, to her neck, to her ear before proceeding to almost every part of her body and it was blinding her of any coherent thoughts.

"Athrun…"

She heard herself mewling and begging him about something she wasn't even sure of. And when he fully indulged into her, she felt a million sensations run through her veins. It sent her arching, with her arms clinging to his back and the other, clutching the sheet next to her. From time to time, she would hear him whisper her name and he would look at her in the eye and kiss her after that. Both of them, catching their breathe, their chests heaving in rhythm as his broad one was over her softness, they were both sweating even though the aircon was still on and he couldn't care less about the time, knowing that she was here with him, on his bed.

It was that comforter that had been their refuge after the passion and intimacy. Her head rested on his arm and her arms rested on his chest. Everything around them was silent. He kept staring on the ceiling as she took entertainment into glancing at the ticking clock on his side of the bed. They talked after both of them got their so-called sanity back and she listened as he told her how her secretary had been a blabbermouth and was the one who told him about her dating session…

"Didn't you ever think that she likes you, that's why she told you about it?"

She sensed the very intention of that foxy woman that was sadly her secretary. She was also a woman, you know. and she knows their urges as well. But she doesn't even like one of it, especially the one that is about stealing men already in a relationship. And this caused her to send him a pout as he continues to deny what he was being accused of.

"I don't think so, we seldom talk"

"But she stares at you whenever you visit me."

"She does?"

She couldn't help but pout more and more to the insensitivity that she was hearing from him.

"Athrun, you should try noticing the advances that was often being shown around you. How can you be so thick headed despite being a coordinator…?"

"So, you're saying I should pay attention to your secretary whenever I visit you?"

His inquiry ended with a grin on his face and she took it as sign to pound on his chest for attempting to flirt with other women.

"Ah! You…Athrun! You two timing coordinator! Don't you ever think you could get away with saying such a thing? You married me and then-"

All in all he was just laughing at her reaction to what he said. It was fun teasing her from time to time. But he knew he had to calm her down as he slowly pulled her back into arms.

"Okay, okay…I was only joking."

"Idiot!"

"I know…"

After a while he felt her smile…

"But it's okay. I'm used to it now."

"Really?"

"Yeah, because Idiots marry idiots, you know. And I intend to stay with the coordinator that I married"

For him, it was like hearing a child's proud remark.

"Cagalli…"

"Hmm?"

"Nextime, Let's go to Plants, _together_"

Nextime he wouldn't be alone.

The nextime she wouldn't be sending him away.

Both of them refused to sleep that night. Because it is not rest that they want but new memories of intimacy. He repeated those movements and inflicted the same reaction from her. It would seem like they were weaving, Creating a pattern through their synchronized motions. With her holding him and inviting him to do more, and him indulging and fulfilling her every wish. Her phone rang on an endless melody but was left ignored and unheard.

"Only if you promise"

"_Promise_"

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_And as you've read they did IT...ahaha they were married anyway so who cares  
_

_I plan on writing more on it but i tried cutting the length..ahahah (what a pervert sorry...!")  
_

_anyway i really liked cagalli telling Athrun he's an idiot so I often include that in some chapters ...ahahaha  
_

_AND LASTLY, PLEASE DO REVIEW not only in my fic but to also to other fics...  
_

_because most of them are really good but few write a review  
_

_so PLEASE let's ENCOURAGE those authors to continue okay :)  
_

_READ AND REVIEW: D_


	14. Meeting gone mad

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

**THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!**

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

* * *

_###_

Cagalli Yula Attha, the only daughter of the deceased Uzumi Nara Attha. A female, a fighter, a princess. After her father died, she shouldered the responsibility of raising a country from its own ashes. She worked more than the hours in a day could contain. Sometimes, she doesn't eat in exchange for paying attention to a bunch of papers with a single deadline. This is how her life works now and she's pretty much been doing well on it. Attending meetings…

Listening during a conference…

Pretending not to fall asleep…

Asking during discussions…

But somehow, today…

"Admiral Zala, would you care to show me the military agendas for this month?"

"New Armaments and machineries would be arriving next week and the number of new trainees has increased twice the former, were planning to implement quality control and a new intensive training"

Indeed, today was also a meeting about the same old topics needed to be discussed again and again for the development of a single country. A day when such a young princess would be surrounded by a number of old men who all seem to have a fancy for reading papers with such small font sizes. But today was somehow different, because she was there and…

"Is that so..."

"Thank you for your report Admiral Zala"

"By all means, Representative Attha"

_He was also there…_

Certainly, they both knew these things were bound to happen atleast a hundred times in their lives. An admiral having a meeting with a representative with a couple of old geezers wasn't really something weird or uncommon. Both of them have their respective shoes to fill into and there was neither turning back nor saying 'no' to it. In the past, She didn't exactly have a choice. So, in the end, he made the choice to be with her. But no matter how much they try to put on that expected façade known as professionalism and work ethic, whenever they're together that mask of pretense seems to slip a tiny bit leaving her praying that it won't fall off in front of a meeting.

"So, I've heard that the representative refused the marriage proposal of the proud Roy Meitner"

The voice of the old jolly councilman Briggs began to introduce such irrelevance in the middle of a military conference which caught all of the people present by surprise. It was about that date session she had a week ago in which the council had expressed their disappointment about her rejecting such a noble man and her completely ignoring them.

_A noble man…Atleast, that's what they think._

"Councilman Briggs, I believe that kind of topic should be dealt with outside or after the meeting"

"And why not, Colonel Huess? The representative's future is at stake here…Hahaha"

He was just joking around. Despite being an intelligent strategist, He was famous for being trivial and funny.

Both of them became witness to a new argument between two old councilmen. Suddenly the meeting turned itself into some ridiculous debate about whether her personal life must be opened to the public. It may not be a big deal among the council members and the military officers but to talk about it in front a number of people…it sure did felt awkward for the two of them just watching. For god's sake, it was hard enough that they were pretending not to be familiar with each other. And then this?

"Uhmm, It's just that were not compatible that's all"

She interjected to dismiss the topic as quickly as possible…

While the Admiral scans the papers and kept a demeanor of not caring at all

It was supposed to be an ordinary meeting after all when…

"We couldn't get on the single topic and I guess he was far from what I prefer"

"Oh? Is that so…well why didn't representative Attha say so? Maybe we could recommend another…"

"Mr. Keiser , Director Allen Reese, Mr. Lou's son or…"

All hell broke loose…

"Perhaps Admiral Zala"

"What?"

"What?"

It was just a joke for the Councilman but it did hit the right spot for the both of them to lose their cool.

Suddenly he stopped flipping the pages he didn't even read.

"Come again, Mr. Briggs?"

She had the guts to confirm what he just said, as if wanting another punch seconds after the first one.

"Why, don't you like him? I believe all women here on orb have taken a liking to this gentleman right here. Is the representative an exception to that?"

"T-That's not what I meant. It's just that I-"

"Hahaha…And why not? Admiral Zala is of the same age and a promising young man. I believe despite the number of women, he's currently not in a relationship. Am I right Mr. Zala?"

"Councilman Briggs, we should really dismiss this topic of yours"

"Hahaha…Well atleast let us hear what the admiral had to say"

All eyes began to focus on him. Unexpectedly everyone began to care of what his answer would be. Councilman Briggs was just doing this to amuse himself but it was turning into some serious situation in which both of them could possibly be caught. She glanced at the people once more and they looked more and more ridiculous about being curious into something trivial. While her being a canvass of mixed colors possible remained unnoticed to everyone. And then she began to think about it…

If he confirms then they're both screwed

But if he denies. She would definitely feel disappointed.

She knew the consequence of their hidden relationship. But it seems difficult for her to accept denial as one of the means to keep it as it is. Ironically, she found herself waiting for his answer, although she knew he would end up choosing the latter.

She looked at him, which is the first time that day.

In his every movement, what made her surprise, is to see him smile…

"You flatter me too much, sir"

"To be honest with you sir, I wouldn't want _her_ to hear that"

"Oh? So you do have a girlfriend, …"

"For me she's the only one I want. She kept me grounded and she's the reason I stay in Orb. She's not ordinary though, that's for sure…"

"I wouldn't say 'girlfriend' but it goes without saying I'm in a relationship right now"

"And I refuse to be with someone else…"

"…"

"Hmm Oh well, I guess…That's bad news, right Representative Attha?"

She expected him to deny everything; she was prepared for it anyway. She was ready for the blow that it may cause in her heart but all of sudden, what she got was something else. She felt it for real. Her heart skipping a beat. The feeling that you matter to someone you love, the words that you wouldn't hear every day, at a single second, she saw how much she meant to him that he couldn't even lie about denying them. Again, he made her realize something which made her smile to everyone and say…

"It sure is…"

"Well I have to say, she may have been lucky to meet you admiral"

"That could have been the other way around Representative"

With words or just a single glance…everything is within reach

"That's it for today. Pls. do schedule another meeting, let my secretary know and please be informed that I expect no interruptions, next time. And Admiral Zala, may I speak with you for a moment in my office?"

"Sure"

"As for everyone, meeting adjourn"

Today was really supposed to be an ordinary meeting. With her dismissing everyone and going back home. Instead after the meeting, she was here in her office, a place she liked the least with the person she loved the most. People kept passing by the hallway and saw the representative and the admiral walk inside without even a hunch of suspicion but what remains unknown to them is that, behind a closed door everything was a different story.

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

**READ AND REVIEW: D**


	15. Crumbling memories

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

**THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW**!

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

_###_

* * *

"_You're a murderer…"_

_It was her face and those amber eyes presented before him. Darkness surrounds as he stares at her form standing right in front of him. She looked pale and her eyes were dead. Suddenly her voice echoed and those few words were the first to come out of her lips._

_Murderer…_

_He found it impossible, extremely impossible for her to say that to him. She always smiled and knew no judgement to anyone but what she is right now in front of him says otherwise the opposite. The pain started to reek inside. Guilt was slowly seeping right through his very bones and the first thing he wanted to know as of this moment was…_

"_Cagalli, why are you saying that? I'm not-"_

"_You know you are!"_

"_No I'm-"_

"_Stop denying it…you carry nothing but blood in your hands"_

"_You're tainted…"_

_Suddenly, he saw blood in his hands and he began to kneel in panic. He knelt while she stood looking at him with disgust. He was trembling, afraid from the way she keeps looking at him like some cockroach that he is. He loved her like no one else but he wasn't feeling her loving him back. She was smirking and kept on saying…_

"_You killed all of them…" _

_And deep inside those repressed truths came rushing back and he realized she was right…_

"_That's not true…and you know it"_

"_I saw each and every one of them die…in your hands"_

"_Hahaha…Everything you touch perished. You loved war didn't you? You crave to see their bodies crumble into pieces right before your feet"_

"_You're a bloody murderer. And it is because of you that their love ones cry in despair…"_

"_You know the truth, yourself. Hahaha"_

_The war made him do it. It wasn't his fault to begin with. He only wanted to protect the things that matter to him. She had been a witness on how controlling a powerful machine was never a privilege for him. It has always been a sacrifice, as if selling your soul to the devil just so others could lead a more peaceful life than what he had. He refused to see many people die but what he did may have been the contrary. He killed many along the way, those who have been innocent, feeding a family and more of those faceless soldiers. And all of it, only to protect._

_But as the blonde's figure begin to vanish revealing a new persona, he will begin to realize once more. That what he did, never served its purpose from the very start._

"_I believed in you, Athrun"_

"_Mother?"_

"_But in the end, you left me to die"_

"_N-No, I didn't! They-"_

"_You were just powerless…"_

_Together with her mother, he saw that very person who may have loathed him the most…_

"_Father"_

"_You are my son and yet you've become too weak…"_

"_I-I could-"_

"_You couldn't protect anyone…!"_

"_Your mother, me and even yourself…"_

"_It's not my fault. You-"_

"_My will rests in your hands and yet you chose to tread away from it. You're a failure Athrun…"_

"_And that is why; more of them would suffer the same fate…"_

_One by one. Piles of corpses appeared and he became wide eyed in each and every one of them. They were his comrades Nicol , Heine and soldiers he had fought with during the war. From a distance he saw a glimpse of Meer's dead body but refused to come near it. He walked in the aisle of bodies lying breathless in their own blood. He looked back and saw the figure of his parents falling to the ground like lifeless dummies. _

"_Nicol, Heine!"_

"_Mother!"_

_He called out to them, only to realize that he was left alone  
_

_They died and he was at fault. No matter what he does to repent for his past sins, he knew it would never be enough to reclaim the life that was lost. He has only himself to blame because when he chose to kill he never managed to protect. He gave his best. On what? To make his father proud? To prevent coordinators from winning the war? On preventing another war? Everything that he did turned out to have the opposite effect._

_His father was right, He was nothing but a failure_

_The numbers of corpses keep increasing as he continues to make his way. He ignored some of them but one caught his attention. He saw her there, her body, all disheveled together with his best friend's corpse. They were both dead. He ran straight to their direction and carried her in his arms in disbelief and never wanting to tear her hair to reveal her face. Her body was blood shot cold and carried that decaying stench. His hands, trembling, shoved her hair on to reveal…_

"Cagalli!"

He woke up from a dream.

Dreams were never his friends and there were times when he feels that sleep does not want to be his companion. There were things he doesn't want to remember. Memories he couldn't take to be reminded of. How many years has it been since the death of his loved ones? How many years has it been since he left for Orb? No matter what he does, things just keep coming back and tonight he will realize that he had been asking the wrong question all his life and what he must ask himself is…

_How long will it take?_

His chest heaved as if running out of breath…

His eyes kept on wandering as he was unsure of what to do…

His body full of sweat and his hair all disheveled…

His fears have returned and this time…it plans to stay for good

"_Shit! I feel like throwing up"_

…

…

"Admiral"

"Admiral Zala!"

…

"W-what?"

"I asked if we could proceed now to the demonstration."

"S-Sure… go ahead then"

"Yes Sir!"

He forced himself in going to work that morning. After that so-called dream, he was unable to get back to sleep, for the fear that he may have the same visions again. He tried his best not to think about it but contrary, it was what he was thinking about at the start of the day. He kept on spacing out and his subordinates were starting to worry for him. He called for a car because he refused to drive in such unsteady state.

"_I think I'm gonna be sick…"_

His head was hurting more and more. Everything had been okay since yesterday and yet a single dream caused him to crack bit by bit. Maybe he just woke up from the wrong side of the bed. Maybe a couple of pills and meds could solve his pounding headache; he just needs to keep things right before he could take some rest. He looked at his workers moving from each and every direction as he tries to pull himself together. He saw one of them turn back at him with such panic, suddenly everyone was facing him in fear and they were all calling out his name…

"Admiral!"

But they were all too late…

He just stood there as they were calling him to move

And now, he was lying on the ground

Losing his vision and consciousness.

with thelast thing he caught sight of…

Was his blood.

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_READ AND REVIEW: D_


	16. Stay

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

**THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!**

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

_###_

* * *

"You should take a rest for a couple of days"

Conscious with a bandaged right arm, he returned to his place to follow just like what the doctor had ordered him to. Apparently, a thick metal cylinder fell above from a lifting vessel and unfortunately, he was disoriented enough to be spotted under the falling object. There were no serious injuries though and he assured his men that he was fine.

_Although deep inside something just doesn't seem right…_

Now here he was, lying on his couch, drowning himself with his own thoughts. Sighing about how everything just keeps coming back as of this moment. How he didn't do what his father had wanted him to do, how all of his comrades died during the war, how he wasn't able to protect anyone even his own resolve. He even tried asking himself that same question he had failed to answer in the past…

"What am I trying to do…?

"_What am I living for then…?"_

But once again, he found no answer.

The more that time passes, the emptier he felt. The feeling of being alone, with nothing to cling onto, has begun to resurface. It was starting to eat him up including those past sins he had committed. This place for him was a pit and he no longer cares about eating or putting the lights on. He wanted that fake peace even just a little longer until…

"…"

"…"

A knock was heard from his door. But as he cluelessly reached for it, leaving the comfort that his couch had provided for him and not even caring who it was, it would reveal that only hope who could pull him up from his grave that he made for himself.

"Athrun! What took you so long?"

"C-Cagalli…"

_Murderer…_

Suddenly her face pushed back that dream back to his mind. And it was all clear. Now that dream was beginning to turn into reality. Every part of her made those memories so tangible and it was turning itself into a nightmare.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"…"

"Hey, Athrun!"

"h-huh?"

"You look like you just saw a ghost. What's wrong?"

"Nothing, step inside"

With 'worried' being an understatement, she rushed to his place after knowing what happened to him at the field. She was worried sick about what could have happened to him and was dead set on seeing him. He was all that her mind could think of and she wanted to see for herself if he was alright.

"Hey, Why is it so dark in here?"

"…"

The air around him was different.

But maybe, she was just mistaking.

"Does it still hurt?"

"Yeah…"

"What happened back there?"

"I was just being careless, that's all"

_Every word he said dragging their conversation to a dead end…_

"Eeh! You should be careful next time! It could cause you your life, you know!"

"Sorry…"

_Something's wrong…_

"Well! Since you're sorry…I'll let it pass."

Both of them sat in the couch as she held his injured arm and eyed it with so much care. She knew that his job would definitely make him gain some but it was really hard for her to see him injured even so. She went to see his wound but she noticed something other than that. There was something different about him. He wasn't a talkative person but his silence and responses was not normal either. She had been very glad to see him and it showed through her smiles which she didn't even dare hide. But every time she would face him to prevent that awkward moment from emerging, he would just look at her with such lifeless eyes.

"I made a lot of mistakes in the past…"

"Huh?"

"Cagalli…"

"What?"

"I'm not going to die yet"

"Huh? Of course you're not! I don't get what you mean"

"Nothing, I was just saying…"

…

Everything he did, everything he just said, was clear proof that there was something wrong. Something's not right about him the moment she entered the room and she can sense it but was also afraid to admit that she doesn't want confirming it. It pains her to see him with that lifeless expression but she couldn't do anything because he was building up a wall , just so he could hide away.

_But from whom? _

_From her?_

She couldn't do anything at all but pretend for him with atleast a smile on her face.

"Your being weird Athrun…"

…

"Sorry…"

"W-where are you going?"

His sudden tight grip on her wrist caught her by surprise…

"You panic too much. I'm going to the kitchen. I don't know why but it seems pretty obvious that you haven't eaten yet

She went to the kitchen after putting up a gleeful face for him. She left him at the living room, hoping that after cooking a meal for him, he'll be more of himself when she faces him again. There was something about him that she couldn't put a finger on and it was all too frustrating that she couldn't do anything for him. She wanted to be by his side; to be there for him so that he will come to know how much she values him. But tonight, he was starting to fulfill that one single fear she had between had been repressing the most. That fear, that once she takes her eyes of him, the winds of change might suddenly sneak up on them and shatter everything they have worked for.

"What do you wa-"

Her nightmare has just began.

"A-Athrun, what are your d-doing?"

He came up from behind and pressed his chest on her back. She suddenly felt his lips slowly attacking her neck as his arms were snaking by her soft frame. His palms and lips were cold and left her shivering to his every movement. He made her face him and she saw how each trace of who he was, was starting to vanish and yet, she chose to willingly offer her lips to his. He was increasing the tension, making his purpose clear in each glide of his fingers. And just as the water has already reached its boiling point, so was her desire for him.

_Oh how could his lips make her forget about everything…_

With both of them this intimate, she senses more of him and how hurried his motions are. It felt like it was a need rather than a moment to share. His touches were deeper and were made out of frustration. She may have realized that she was about to make love with another person but, regardless who he was, that person carried the face of the person she loved.

"Athrun, please! I-I'm cooking…"

"Forget that"

"What?"

"Come with me…"

She felt her knees giving up as he carried her like a sacrifice towards his bed. He turned off the fire and shoved the knife away from her hand leaving an unfinished business and a forgotten kitchen.

"Athrun…"

That was all she could do , call out his name whether due to negation or acceptance ,when she felt him attack her neck once more. He raised her arms, held them together with a single hand and she was helpless against his forceful motions that he presses against her. She felt the his weaker arm knead her right softness and sent her arching towards his chiseled chest. The urge was just too blinding and too addicting to be able to recover that quickly and even think that he had been injured a while ago. She couldn't do anything but surrender in his raw strength as he works his way to her. But as she feels his teeth on her ear she heard him whisper…

"You won't leave me…"

"Huh?"

"Cagalli, you're mine now"

"I won't let you leave me…"

"Even if you see me as murderer, I still won't let you go"

She attempted to look at him but his grip and hold on her body made her unable to do so. Fear rather than lust was becoming more evident on her expression. She was so afraid about what she was hearing that she began to retaliate and beg for him to let her go.

"Athrun, Stop this! You're scaring me!"

He placed his hands on both sides of her shoulders with his thumb pressing deeper and made her look at him.

"What are you doing?"

"Cagalli, I may be a murderer but I'm still you're husband"

"Murderer? What are you talking about. I don't-"

"Admit it. I know you think of me that way. Bur I won't let go of you"

"Because you're mine"

"You hear me Cagalli, you're mine!"

And that was all it took for her right hand to suddenly move and mark a red tinge in his cheek. She was just listening to him a while ago and was becoming more and more afraid as she hears those statements of insanity come right out of his mouth. He was different. The person in front of her is not Athrun but a crazy person who thinks of himself as a murderer. Athrun was not like that, he may have married her but he never owned her as if she was some kind of material that he could buy. She was neither a material thing nor a captive but what she heard was just too painful to bear for her dignity.

"I am not yours"

"You never said anything like that before…"

"You always told me to make it my choice if I stay by your side or not…"

"I'm not your captive Athrun! I'm your wife"

Her actions forced his motions to a halt. Everything was numbing and he was unaware of what was he even saying back there. He wanted her not for her presence but as a disturbance so that his past demons would stop haunting him for a while. He felt the guilt when he gazed at her eyes pooling with tears and he knew so well how he deserved that slap on his cheek. In a way, it forced him back to reality but it might have been too late to even say sorry because right in front him, he can see how devastated he made her feel.

"You're wound is healing fine. It may be best if I go home for now"

She walked past him with a regret to not even look at him.

But to no avail, he took his chance and held her hand.

"Even if it's just for pity, stay"

"…"

He begged for her but she asked him to let go.

"Get some sleep Athrun. You need that"

Because everything was just too much for her to bear

And she could no longer stand staying in a room with him being a complete stranger

Outside, as she ran sobbing in the hallway, that loud thud she just made closing the door caused her to regret walking away from him. His touch still lingers and she could almost feel him. He may have needed her at some point but she couldn't stomach what he had just said. She too was feeling guilty for leaving him alone but she thought that it was best since they were both being unsteady back there. There was nothing left for them but hope. Hope that everything would be fine by tomorrow and they could patch things up. But…

"!"

"What's that?"

"Did you hear that?"

"It's a gunshot"

"Where did that came from?"

"It's sounded that it came from somewhere near…"

The people came to a rampage on what they have heard. Her senses started to panic as well causing her to look back to his doorway. She was still in disbelief about who might have pulled the trigger by this time but the people kept running towards where she was looking at.

"_Athrun!"_

…_it may have been too late._

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

**_READ AND REVIEW: D_**


	17. Waiting for warmth

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

**THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!**

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

_###_

* * *

"Cagalli, Please calm down"

"M-Myrna, we…were j-just talking and then we got into an argument and I went out and he…he-"

"Cagalli, calm down. We got him in the hospital. Everything wound be fine"

"No it won't Myrna! I saw him in the bathroom and his blood…with a gun! and-"

When she heard that gunshot she rushed straight back to his room and saw him all drenched in blood. She could still hear herself cry out his name when she saw him lying under the cold spray of the shower. She even tried to wake him up but he wasn't regaining consciousness.

She had been helpless and can't even blink at the sight of him for a tiny bit. Help started to arrive and due to that persisting fear that someone might notice her she hid herself among the crowd and stared at his form being lifted to the ambulance.

That's was how her maid saw her at the hospital shivering and crying to no end. Her clothes all stained with blood. She looked miserable and all messed up... Everyone around her was moving, the nurses, doctors suddenly arriving one after the other and Myrna couldn't do anything but cradle her sobbing form just to calm her down.

"I left him."

She began to speak out of despair, still unable to stop the tears from flowing.

"I knew he needed me. He…he even begged me to stay."

"Cagalli, don't blame yourself-"

"It was my fault, Myrna"

"If I just stayed by his side. He wouldn't have done that…"

She heard herself cry harder. Myrna felt her arms clinging tighter to her embrace. She could feel the despair and how clouded her mind is right now as Cagalli grabbed hold of her. To wait is such an agony especially if one awaits about whether the person you love most is dead or not. It wasn't a small fight, for it established that unusual feeling of fear inside her but she didn't expect that he was suffering that much that he was able to shoot himself.

"May I know who are the relatives of Mr. Athrun Zala?"

The doctor came out of the room and she suddenly rushed towards him, unable to introduce who she was. But the doctor clearly didn't recognize her on how messy she looked like and somehow, she didn't really thought of what to say next.

"And you are?"

"I-I'm…"

"_I'm his wife"_

"I'm the one who saw him in his place"

He killed himself right before her eyes. He was rushed into a hospital in the brink of time and she hid herself in a crowd. Everything was a matter of life or death but here she was introducing herself like she was some kind of stranger that was making an excuse of just passing by when the incident happened. Seeing how the he eyed her swollen and puffy eyes, she wanted to tell the doctor everything that had occurred . That it was her fault and she was even his wife but the norms, Orbs norms and laws would never give her that freedom to do so. And she found herself surrender in Myrna's lie for the both of them.

"Please, doctor! Representative Attha sent me here. And she wishes to know the condition of the admiral"

She would die to know how he had been. But she wanted it not because he was an admiral but he was Athrun.

"Oh well, I guess if the representative asks me to…"

Fortunately, the doctor took the convenient lie.

"Mr. Zala lost a lot of blood but fortunately, he was sent here on time."

"He's currently out of danger but we still need to check his vital signs for a few hours"

"We believe he was shot in the abdomen seeing how the bullet was traced in his peritoneal cavity. Indeed, he was some lucky man, missing those vital organs but we will still watch out for any internal bleeding in case the X-rays are late to arrive"

"Really? Is Ath-I mean, is the Admiral safe now?"

"For the meantime, I recommend that you all calm down, for Mr. Zala isn't dying as of the moment"

She stared at the doctor's face like he lying to the both of them but was eager for him to tell them that he's still alive.

"C-Can we see him, Doctor Gran?"

"He's currently at the ICU but once he's already moved to a private room. I guess you could"

"Thank you…"

…

After waiting for a few hours, she sat near his bedside right after he was moved to 'more normal' room that doesn't indicate he's in a critical condition. She didn't care whoever might recognize her as they enter the room and she didn't even ask for a change of clothing as his blood was starting to dry up on her clothes. She just wants to be beside him when he wakes up. That's why Myrna took the liberty to go back and get some change of clothes for her, after her persistence that she doesn't want to go home yet. But then again problems come right after the other…

"What are you doing here?"

…and she doesn't like it.

"I'm fetching you, you have a meeting tomorrow. I'm here to get you back"

"Council's orders"

She heard him. But she refuses to follow.

"Cancel it"

"Cagalli, Athrun's not going to leave any mome-"

"I said! Cancel it!"

Just the plain sound of hearing him order her, irritates her that much

"Cagalli , you better listen to me…"

"What part about what I said seems unclear to you? Colonel Kisaka…!"

She will not leave him. When he wakes up she would make sure that she will be there. That she will no longer leave his side no matter what happens. Because she would rather die with him than listen to what Kisaka has been bantering about and go to a loathed meeting for people who didn't even care what she feels. For once, she will not back down for him. Orb could collapse right now but she would stay. For those times that she needed him and he was there but when he was the one suffering, she left him alone.

"Cagalli, speculations about what happened to Admiral Zala was starting to reach the media…"

"You're great at covering things up. Surely you won't need me for making up another lie"

"But Cagalli-"

"I need you to leave Kisaka!"

She made her point. Even if he leaves this room insulted, she will not be shaken by it. This time she has to be strong, for both her and Athrun's sake.

"Cagalli, you and that man is not meant for each other"

"Are you obviously choosing him over Orb's sake? Your father-"

"My father has nothing to do with this!"

"Again I will say this to you and don't make me repeat myself. Colonel, I need you to leave, right now!"

And he did as he was ordered, defeated by the resolve she had over staying at the hospital and not attending the meeting. He often thought that Cagalli treated her like her own father that's why she would never fight back against him but what he saw, made him think otherwise. He tried to control her, told her about what her father had wanted her to due to these things happening all of a sudden, he could sense her going against his plans for Orb and it irks him to see her choose a single man over a whole country.

"You would regret this Cagalli"

"I already did one regrettable thing and I'm not doing it again"

With that he left and closed the door.

When they were finally alone with Kisaka now gone, silence became her companion in this white room. She went to look at his sleeping form and gently held one of his hands to her face. His skin felt cool and powerless. She watched his every breath, thankful for each heave that he makes. His face was serene and for a while she thought that he might be dreaming of something nice.

Maybe about his childhood and maybe about those haros.

Her heart was in peace.

How she wants him to wake up right now. She wants to see him open his emerald eyes so that the first thing he would see was her smile. He would have been glad. But for now, all she could do was wait, just like what he did for her.

"I leave you for a while and you try to shoot yourself… What an idiot"

"The doctor said it's going to take a month for you to heal completely. That would really hurt when you take a bath, you know"

…

…

"So that's how it is…"

_Even if you see me as murderer, I still won't let you go_

"It was a dream wasn't it?"

She spoke to him, uncaring if he could hear her or not.

"Or a call or a telegraph from god knows where…"

…

_I made a lot of mistakes in the past…_

"I told you back then remember?"

"When you lose control of yourself and the past starts killing you…"

Her tears began to fall as she stares steadily on his face with his hand still being held by hers.

"You have to tell me! so that I can be strong for you"

She couldn't take another bout on their relationship and she certainly won't take the idea of him dying right before her eyes again. She was certainly the one to blame for this. It was her fault because it took time before she could understand what he felt and she could've been late to see him alive. She cried as she awaits for him to wake up, because that was the only thing she could do, for now.

"Athrun, you're not a murderer! And if you are I would still look at you in the eye and tell you how much I want to be with you"

"We're together now, please don't scare me like that again…"

"I can't bear the thought of you leaving me. I won't leave you any more so please wake up"

"I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere, so please open your eyes"

_Even if it's just for pity, stay_

She remembered his every word..._  
_

Her tears seemed to fall endlessly. She held his hand tighter, feeling that he was still alive. It was a need for her, to keep on believing that he was indeed okay. She was so afraid of him back there but she realized how her greatest fear would be losing him. She couldn't take her eyes of him, fearing that someone might take him away or he might stop breathing any moment. He trusted his fate on her hands but she did not take notice of it. And now, it's no longer hers to decide.

"I'm sorry Athrun…I'm sorry for being this late."

Tonight, with not only silence and him by her side…

Her tears would cradle her to sleep.

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_**READ AND REVIEW: D**_


	18. Just this once

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

**THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!**

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

_###_

* * *

She was nowhere to be found.

It's been a week since he opened his eyes. Day after day visitors come and go. Controversies seemed to be covered already and yet there was this one big problem…

…

"Admiral, are you sure you're alright, now?"

"I told you, I'm fine already. Go back to your stations. You have work to do"

After he woke up, he found those dreams disappearing one by one. Nightmares no longer play with his mind and sleep becomes more and more pleasant during the nights. He was told that he had to stay at the hospital for a few more days. Sometimes he gets visited by his young subordinates and fool around in his room. He received a video call from Kira and assured everyone that he was fine.

He still cannot believe how things were happening in front him. Everything appears to be going well, like someone just pulled him from a hollow pit and dragged him up. The only difference was when he opened his eyes, the person he wanted to see the most wasn't there.

"Oh well, might as well go back. C'mon you guys"

"Okay, but Admiral…Can we ask one thing?"

"If I ignore you, you'll just pester me until I cave in won't you?"

"Hahaha…that's true, so…"

"So… what?"

"We were just wondering, when are we going to meet your girlfriend…hehe"

"Huh?"

"You know…that girl that brought you lunch in the field…"

_Cagalli…_

"Oh, her…"

"Sorry, but…it may take a while before you see her again"

"_It will really take a while"_

Everything was white when he opened his orbs for the first time. No amber, not even a shade of gold. His fears were no longer there but there was no happiness either. It was just nothingness. His trainees weren't really a bother but they were too tiring to deal with once in a while. They are a bunch of happy-go-lucky teenagers but he believed they have the talent and intelligence to be capable of protecting the things most precious to them, unlike him.

"Take care of yourself, Admiral…"

"We're going now…"

"Go back, now!"

"We're coming back okay"

"No way! Report to your superiors, quick!"

One door shut and he was once again alone. With the loudness brought by their laughter now gone, his mind suddenly became occupied with the important things, _Her_.

"_Please, don't tell the princess. I told you this…"_

"_She only goes here when you're asleep. She's always here you know. Bringing food and going home with the same swollen eyes from crying. I know your relationship with my princess. That's why I wanted to tell you this…"_

Somehow, he thought that she got really mad at him, that's why she didn't even dare visit. Truth is, he wanted to get out of the hospital, so that he could talk to her and apologize for being such a lunatic and even hurting her feelings. Even though the doctors said that his wounds might open, he's still determined. But what he heard when Myrna visited him once might have cleared things up a bit.

That's why, if it's the only way to see her, he will…

…

…

"Good afternoon, Athrun…"

In every visit, she finds contentment talking to his sleeping form. His breathing always seemed to calm her these past few days, telling her not to worry about him anymore. It's not that she doesn't want to talk to him as when he was awake but she knew how harder she would cry once she sees him and she doesn't want him to see her like that. She just doesn't want to make him think, he was the one who hurt her. She knew that he would blame himself for it and he had been blaming too much already towards himself a lot lately. That's why for her, seeing him alive is enough for now…

"I guess it's time to change the flowers, huh"

"Well good news, I heard from the doctor that you'll be discharged this coming Monday…"

It was always the same time during the day that she goes to see him. When she's assured that he's already asleep. Each day, she would quietly open the door and greet him as she looks at him sleeping. She would bring a bunch of food with her and change the flower in the vase once in a while. She told her maids that if he asked about it, just tell him that it was Myrna that brought it for him.

Sometimes, when she doesn't feel like leaving him yet, she would create this excuse to sit for a while beside him and peel an apple slowly. Always she would do that in order to bide time and be with him a little longer, so that when he wakes up, he'll be able to eat something. But today, she realized that all this time, thinking that he wasn't hearing her…

"Mr. Briggs has been so worried about you. You better visit him, once you manage to get back"

"I brought food today, so you have to fini-"

…

"_He's awake…"_

…

When realization took over, she left the apple unfinished and ran to the door. She doesn't understand why she was trying to avoid him and how stupid it was but she had to get out of this place at once. She held the knob, turned it with such carefulness, believing that his eyes were still closed. And with one pull left to do…

"You left the apple half peeled…"

She heard him from behind and it was already too late to escape.

"I-I was sent here by the representative to bring food and-"

"That wig won't do the trick…"

"Cagalli"

It was useless though…

To lie…

To hide…

To pretend…

Somehow, she knew they would end up this way. With him being smart and her being a moron about not noticing how smart he was. It was only a matter of time.

"You were listening, all this time. Weren't you…"

"Yeah"

"Since when?"

"Just today"

"Liar"

"It's true, I knew what you were doing and I originally planned to fool you but I didn't want you to get angrier at me that you've already been"

With her not even looking back at him and still focused at the knob that she held as a futile chance for escape, she spoke to him with such indifference and he sensed that coldness and how unhappy she was on how things had ended up. He was just answering, hoping she would speak to him a little bit more.

"You come in here when you know I'm already asleep. That's why even though I won't be able to respond and not even sleepy. I still try to do so…"

"Why?"

"I was waiting for you."

She knows how he had always been and yet, she still won't give up on avoiding him.

"The…the apple, you could peel that don't you? I have a meeting in a few hours so-"

"Cagalli"

"…"

"I guess I'll see you then, Goodb-"

"Come here"

"…"

"Come here and face me"

Suddenly his caring voice began to crumble up the cold façade she was putting up. No matter how many times he asks, no matter what words he uses, no matter how obvious it was that she would end up following him, she still chose to shake her head and not even facing him. Until…

"I promise, I won't touch you. Just come here…"

Maybe she got scared of what he did to her. That's why maybe if he would assure her...

Her feet started to move her form nearer and nearer to his side. How painful it was to promise that thing that you yearn to do the most. And how it hurts to see the one you love take it as a promise just so you could make her come to your side. When she finally stood beside him, he noticed how tired she looked, her face showed the aftermath of despair and he felt responsible for every bit of it.

"I wanted to shoot myself in the head"

The shock of his statement made her raise her head up and face him and he saw how stunned she was from what he said. Her fears began to surface once more but he had to tell her everything. Because it was the right thing to do, explain.

"My past, won't stop coming back in my mind and I wanted it to stop"

"…even for just a single moment"

"I was so sure, that I wanted nothing but peace but I remembered you…"

Her face…

Her smile…

Her tears…

"At that time, I was so scared, not of dying, but of me leaving you"

"I knew you would cry and-"

"Athrun…"

That thing that he hated started right before his eyes. Her tears flowed from her amber Orbs as she gripped the sheets of his bed. And he couldn't do anything to stop it.

"You promised me! …You promised me you'll live"

"Cagalli…"

"I-I was so scared. I thought you were really going to leave me…"

He scanned her features and how she wiped her tears in between her hiccups. She looked like a lost child beside him.

"Your past makes you who are. So I will accept you no matter what"

"But I'm a-"

"You're not a murderer!"

"You're not a soldier!"

"You're Athrun!"

"For me…You're just Athrun…"

"Please don't get lost from my side, again"

Finally losing his will on fulfilling his side of the deal, he touched her face and wiped out a single tear from the many that already left her eyes. Her tears break him and those strong walls that he built and he felt his tears following hers as he attempts to wipe every tear that trickle from her face. He looked so weak when she looked at him and that's when she realized she couldn't stay mad at him any longer. It wasn't his fault and it wasn't hers either. But if they fail to resolve this nightmare, they will not have a choice but to blame themselves for it.

"I thought you wouldn't touch me…"

"You broke your promise Athrun…"

"You were crying and I can't help it"

"Stupid! Then wipe your own tears…"

She was argued. He laughed.

"Cagalli…"

"What?"

"I'm not leaving you anymore, and I won't let you go either"

"You better be"

"I'm seriously marrying Roy Meitner if you leave me, Idiot!"

_In the end, she knows she can't. because he was the only one._

"I won't, I promise"

With his final statement, she saw that sincerity in his promise. She felt relief in every word that he said and it turned her tears into a smile. His arms were now wrapped on her waist as she lashed herself to him, in an embrace. The warmth from the contact brought a mixture of happiness and contentment. Her embrace made him remember everything and how he wanted to live for her. He was no longer treading the dark path and it was all thanks to her.

"Let's grow old together"

"Yeah"

"With kids"

"Yeah"

…

"Cagalli, my wound hurts already so could we…"

"No"

"So this is the mysterious girlfriend, everyone's been talking about"

Lost in an embrace, both of them distanced from each other the moment they realized there was someone who entered the room. It was Councilman Briggs and in an instant, Cagalli realized that they might have been caught, she began to panic until…

"Councilman, Thank you for visiting"

She felt a warm hand placed over hers. Then she suddenly remembered how she was still wearing that brown long wig and skirt. Far different from her usual attire as the representative. She was completely someone he never knew.

"_What a relief"_

"I had a little time left before my meeting with Ms. Attha"

"Oh really"

"_You're already meeting me"_

"Well, won't you introduce me, to your beautiful _friend_, here?"

"Oh, ah, uhmm…this is…this is-"

"Hi, I'm Yula. Nice to meet you"

For a moment, with her in a seemingly ridiculous costume, she thought that for once they could tell the whole world what they are. Atleast in front of the councilman that is. Her fingers intertwined with his as they both conversed with the councilman like it's just an ordinary day. She felt that happiness showing the old man in front of them, how much they matter to each other. During the whole conversation, she couldn't help but smile. Maybe she was pretending to be someone else but with showing their relationship all out in the open it's the only thing that matter.

"Have we met before? You look familiar"

"No, this is the first time. I've met you Sir"

Feeling the warmth of his fingers

Knowing that she would still meet him tomorrow and every waking moment.

She doesn't regret anything.

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_probably the longest, i'll ever write.  
_

_sorry for the late update. I'm on duty at the hospital OR for two days  
_

_so that's my excuse. hahaha  
_

_**READ AND REVIEW: D**_


	19. Of Olives and cheesecake

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

**THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!**

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

* * *

_###_

Orb, one of those neutral yet powerful countries in the world. A place where both naturals and coordinators could live in peace with each other. The country has been a progressive one these past few years. No threat as of the moment and everything seems to have a pleasant flow. Different establishments, different people. In a place where a million unique individuals lives, we find two of those, a blond and an emerald eyed, in an argument about the most important thing as of the moment…

Who does the cooking?

"I can do that…"

"No, you can't. Let me do this"

"Cagalli, I told you already my wound's already healed. A little kitchen duty won't hurt"

Today was a holiday for her. Although it might have been a forced one after arguing with a certain number of people, she still managed to push through on having a day with him. It had been a month since he got out of the hospital and fortunately, everything had been fine since then. After the incident, it always felt like she wanted to see him every day, and today also counts as one of those. She wished to cook for him today but somehow, she didn't know he had a knack for spoiling her plans and was left to stay still as he snatches the ladle and pan from her hands and does to cooking for the both them.

"I can cook you know"

"I know"

"Then why won't you let me?"

Again, she and her childish antics began to appear. And he was just too happy to see it.

"Stop smiling, Myrna taught me how to cook and I'm quite confident with it"

"I never told you, you couldn't. I just told you I could do this"

"Well, what if I am a better cook than you?"

With both of her hand on her waist, her senseless bragging was left ignored and she saw how the smile in his face grew bigger by the moment.

"Stop ignoring me! W-wait, what are you putting in there?"

"Olives and Carrots"

"I know, I just saw you put them in the pan. What I mean was, why are putting those?"

"Well, you can't make the sauce, unless you put those in it"

"You know I hate those. I can't eat that"

"I thought you liked vegetables"

"Well not those!"

Of course he knew very well that she didn't like olives and how she despises carrots the same level as wearing a dress. And she was left wondering why would he even add those up in front of her face. She wondered if he was just teasing her but how could he take it back when he added something she doesn't like already in their food. He saw the grimace on her face but contrary to a person's usual reaction, he thought how amusing she is to watch. And he couldn't help but laugh

"Stop laughing at me! I knew it; I should have chosen takeouts instead"

"Well, you're too late now"

"Why don't you like vegetables? I thought children were the only ones who avoid them"

Getting about on what he was saying, she paused from watching him toss the vegetables and began to retaliate.

"Huh? For your information I'm not a child!"

"Again, I didn't say that you are. Okay, so why don't you like vegetables?"

"Because, they're yucky"

In a single second after the words came out of her mouth, she saw the implication of what she just said and how she pushed herself on her own guilt pit. _Yucky_, what a mature way to describe what someone thinks of vegetables after she just claimed that she wasn't a child. And of course, he was that smart to notice all of these which sent him laughing louder and her being red as ever while a palm was placed on her mouth.

And in the end, with a sigh of retreat she finally gave up. But maybe not for long…

"Okay, but I won't promise I'm eating that"

"Suit yourself"

"Well, there must be something I could do around here. While you do whatever you want"

"You know, there is one. Why don't you take out the cake from the fridge"

And there goes the magic word. When his words finally reached her ears, he glanced on how her frown turned into a gleeful smile, one whose mood has already lighten up. And it was just too amusing to watch. Although he had expected it though, she, smiling after hearing the word 'cake'. Of all things that he knew she would be happy about, this one would always do the trick.

She quickly turned facing the refrigerator, completely ignoring the idea of arguing with him and all of a sudden she turned back and completely looked like a jolly child who saw amazement in being handed a candy for the first time in her life

"Cheesecake!"

All her dismay against those vegetables began to disappear as she opened the box and saw the cheesecake waiting to be eaten. Screw the idea of acting like a child. She just wants to eat the cake, and she means now.

"Wow, it looks delicious"

"Can we eat it now?"

"No, dessert comes last"

"Stingy! I guess I have to bear with it for a while"

"Wait a minute, this cake was so big. You're not fund of sweets, why did you buy something this big?"

"Are you having any visitors?"

Suddenly her curiosity made him pause what he was doing. Although she failed to see the blush come right from his face as she was still looking at the cake with no care. His next word was something she didn't miss.

"I knew you would be happy when you see it"

"I wanted to eat it…with you."

Those were the simple words that he said. Nothing out of the ordinary but something felt special about it. The cake just like him was reserved for its owner and it was never meant to be taken by just anyone. Even though she wouldn't tell him she would visit him. She realized how he has always thought of her in her absence. The feeling of knowing you're loved despite that tangible distance is precious but when that feeling remains minus the distance, you began to realize what comes right after, and that is happiness.

He felt her move behind him. Her head over his left shoulder and her arms encircled on his waist. No need for words, they both knew what they wanted the other to know.

"You still can't eat the cake"

"I know, I was just making sure you won't add anything unusual to the food again"

"Unusual? You mean like bell peppers?"

"What, No! I don't want that Athrun. Please not those"

"Okay, Okay. I won't"

After another hearty laugh from him due to her antics, food was finally done. He let her taste the food before placing it on a plate and she realized how he could be great at almost anything. The food had the things she hated the most but it tasted really great. She thought of complimenting but it was just too humiliating for her ego to do, so instead, she decided to play a little trick on him.

"How can you be so great at everything? This makes me kind of pissed off"

"It's not something I was born with. I learned it whe-"

He was busy reaching for a plate and was completely vulnerable when the cold icing from which he knew where it came from suddenly got on his cheek. Oh how he didn't saw that coming while her arms were placed in his waist. Her little trick really did it this time. He tried to look back and saw the perpetrator already distanced herself from him and trying to act all innocent when they both knew they are the only ones in the room and it was certainly not entertaining for him to put an icing on himself.

"Cagalli…"

It was one of those times she hated to hear her name from his lips, for it sounded more like a threat than his usual caring voice. Oh well…it was just too entertaining for her.

"What?"

"What did I do?"

Once again, he saw her fingers move passing through the cake and getting back on his face. The cold cream once again placing itself on his cheek while she was all too happy to watch. He was a soldier with trained reflexes, for Pete's sake. How could such a girl do that to him, and even twice?

But when she thought she had the upper hand and the conclusion was all for her to decide. She will now begin to realize how a trick she started will come backfiring on her as he lifted the cake in his hands and looked at her with such warning eyes saying that if she doesn't make a run for it in seconds…

"Athrun…I want to eat that cake so…"

"One…"

"C'mon, it was just a joke. I like that cake. So…"

"Two…-Hey get back here!"

She ran towards the living room using the couch as a barricade when he came running after her with both of them giggling. They were laughing like children as they splatter each other with cream and not one losing over the other. Although later on, they will come to realize how they had ruined the cake for such playful yet idiotic deed and they made it so disintegrated that no visitor would even come tasting it, it was all too funny for the both of them, seeing how they made such an artwork to each other's face and clothing.

"Ah! Stop it Ath-"

"Waah! That's unfair!"

"Hahaha! You're face looks funny!"

"Oh yeah! Well…"

"Ah!"

After he decide to let go of the cake and make a chase for her, both of them ended up with him caging her in his arms while they both laugh about how disgusting they look. She was catching her breathe, trying to remove some of the cream she tried placed on his cheek. When both of them calmed down and their laughter could no longer be heard…

"There goes that cheesecake"

"Let's do some cleaning up after. You go take a shower first"

When he was about to let go, He suddenly felt her hugging him back, making that distance disappear and her chest attaching to his. Her warmth was just too enticing, all over so much calming but in that moment of silence, he has yet to continue his revenge on her. After all, he never told her it's over.

"I didn't know you wanted to shower _with me_ that bad"

"What?"

"Ah! Let me down…"

In a single stride, she saw herself over his shoulder being carried like a log to where the bathroom was. She sure didn't expect him to say or even do that and she started to pound on his back playfully while he continue treading towards the shower with a threat that he would have it…_with her. _

"Athrun, wait what about dinner?"

"Cagalli, do you really want to eat dinner, right now?"

With him making it clear what she really wanted to do, she had no choice but to let herself be carried with her laughs ,completely echoing,and ignore dinner for a while. After all she didn't really come for food. She just wanted to be with him no matter what. With the remnants of the said dessert still scattered on his living room and their dinner left to cool on the countertop, the recently arguing individuals could now be found behind the closed door where light could only pass by on the its narrow gaps. And what was left was the sound of the shower trickling down on the cold tiled floors.

"I'm not playing with the cake, nextime"

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_This was just a random light moment I wanted them to have. _

_Hope you liked it. _

_**READ AND REVIEW: D**_


	20. Catch a Break

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online.

This is an AsuCaga Fanfic

**THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE REVIEW!**

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

* * *

_###_

The light gushing through his windows to where the curtains had missed to cover came rushing towards her face, waking her from her slumber. She hates mornings especially when she wakes up in a sudden manner. That's why she hates it when Myrna opens her curtains with no avail or the alarm just won't stop punching her ear drums for a whole minute. But as she opens her eyes and plans to curse the unbearable ray of light…

…she saw his face inches away from her with such calmness brought by his sleep.

His face…

His breathing…

Azure Hair…

And his arms that was steadily wrapped on her form.

She began to realize she was not in her room but on _his._

It was the morning after the night wherein they played with their food to be specific, the cheesecake and ended up having a shower together. She didn't really plan on doing _it_ with him but it's a fact that they were married and it's not like she doesn't like it anyway. Staring at his face always gave her an unimaginable dream in her head. Whenever they share a bed and she wakes up first in his arms, she would always have this idea that she wanted to spend every waking moment with him and quit the job that was left by her father.

But a dream would always remain a dream…

Intangible…

Impossible…

"Cagalli…"

Here in this huge bed covered with only those white sheets, the woman touched the face of the man she loved and observed his every feature fearing that she might forget how he looked like. She surveyed his face a little longer, finding amusement on how resilient he looked as he was sleeping. And suddenly his eyelids slowly revealed his emerald orbs and she knew that what she was seeing was something better than what her daily routine would have presented her. A chance, a gift in each and every hated morning.

"Cagalli…"

She heard her name from his lips despite the half lidded eyes. Her palms kept feeling his face as her thumb glides through his cheek bringing her face near his as she couldn't help but press her lips on his.

"Good Morning"

"Good Morning"

She greeted him. He replied with the same joy.

He pulled her nearer. She hugged him tighter

And he went back to sleep.

"Hey! Don't sleep, what if I'm your captive…"

"I could just kill you, you know!"

"Hey! Athrun! Wake up it's morning already"

He had always been like that. Despite being the gallant and smart man that people imagine of him. Cagalli has been a witness on how he could be so sleepy at times. But despite how she would show him her dismay about it, she understands and would never complain about it.

"Athrun, husbands don't really go sleeping when they have beautiful wives"

She saw her pout turning into a smile crept on her lips as she mutters those words to his sleeping form after giving his face a light pinch. On an ordinary day, she wouldn't just say those words for it would have been too embarrassing for her at the most. But today, at this time, with her morning suddenly turning into a good and pleasant one, she'll make an exception.

Although calm mornings, do also have one of those so called exceptions…

"…"

"…"

"Huh?"

"Athrun, There's someone at the door. Hey Athrun!"

Losing the intimacy and creating some distance between them, she began to shake him and end his peaceful sleep. Although he might have resisted for a few minutes, her endless nudging refrained him from going back to his nap and was eventually forced to dress up in his pants and open the door. Why? Because it would have been weird if the _representative Cagalli _opens the door. And why only his pants?

Because she was already wearing his oversized shirt.

"Athrun! How long has it been?"

With a few rub in his eyes and another yawn. He opened the door uncaring to look at the peeping hole that was made in order to know if an assassin or a delivery man was at the other side of the door. Like Cagalli, he also isn't fund of mornings, especially this one when she just managed to agitate him to wake up.

Taking a few moments to make the person now in front of him register on his coordinator brain…

"Hey! Athrun, that's not a nice way of greeting a long time buddy"

"D-Dearka?"

"Athrun! Who else would it be!"

Looking at the face of his friend that was too jolly for the morning, Athrun was slightly taken aback at the visit of the blonde haired comrade from PLANTS. He really didn't expect him to be in Orb.

"Dearka, what are you doing here?"

"C'mon Athrun don't give me that! I'm here to visit you Of course!"

"W-what? wait…"

With his friend's arm going straight to his shoulder, he felt Dearka dragging himself with him inside his unit. Seriously, he was just loud and doesn't even care if Athrun is still taking time to think why on earth would someone such as Dearka would pay him a visit. But still, he should have been grateful and change his shocked expression…

"Athrun, who was that?"

"…"

…or he will just keep them for a moment.

His eyes opened wider than it ever did, his mouth unsure of what next to say on the person beside him, he totally forgot about that blasted fact about how Cagalli was still in his unit because they did certain activities an evening ago. Looking straight at her, he saw how his shirt was really that big for her and how her hair was tied using a pen. It would have been a romantic moment when he could hug her then and there given their current attire but…

"Uhh…Hi"

"This…might not have been a good time to visit eh?"

As a sigh and a glare shot back at Dearka…

"You don't say"

"…"

"I should... go get changed"

Both blondes found themselves sitting at opposite side of each other as they waited for the only common person in connection with them, get a good amount clothing for his upper body and not make it look like he was in it for another _round_. Surely, Cagalli did get that so-called decent clothing before him as she saw Dearka trying his best to close his mouth and not to act all too surprised, when in fact he did. Now, as those coffees between them did not even serve its purpose for starting a nice conversation, with both of them stealing a glance from each other, unsure of what next to say and finding the situation as awkward as hell, emerged Athrun from his room and finally taking a seat beside her.

"I guess it's too late to even ask you to leave…"

"Now, can you just tell me why the hell are you here?"

"I didn't see anything!"

"Huh?"

"I swear Athrun, I didn't see anything!"

As Dearka's face with a guilt they never knew where it came from flashed before the both of them, Cagalli felt herself halt from the fidgeting and Athrun went into a complete wonderment to a slightly pissed off expression. Their mornings had never been like this and it wasn't supposed to be like this. But as soon as they knew what he was talking about, even the word 'shut up' would never even come out from their mouths.

"Really, I mean I saw her legs but that doesn't really count seeing that she was wearing your clothes doesn't it!

"Huh?"

"Huh?"

With Athrun unsure whether to be mad or ashamed

With Cagalli unsure whether to punch the guy opposite her or glance at Athrun's face

And With Dearka unsure whether to explain himself after seeing his friend's girl wearing only a man's apparel and an underwear at the start of the day or just keep his mouth shut.

When three people find themselves in a battle, not of war but of what expression to keep and to show. When that blush just wouldn't disappear even when you're not even doing anything and when you suddenly become unsure of what next to say or do, it is neither a mystery nor a confusion.

It's just what they call 'awkward'

* * *

_###_

_Hope you liked it…_

_I'm not really comfortable with the length of a drabble so I decided to make it longer_

_This was just a random light moment I wanted them to have. _

_Hope you liked it. _

_**READ AND REVIEW: D**_


	21. One for a million

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online. This is an AsuCaga

Fanfic and I'm writing it in a form of drabbles

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

###

* * *

It was already eleven in the afternoon when she finally set foot once again on her made-up castle. It was already too late for breakfast and lunch would probably be the last thing that would come on her mind for the time. As she scanned the place that had been her home, ever since her mind could remember, it was all too clear to her how Athrun's place was a lot more different compared to where she was right now.

She knows that, and her mind would always be reminded of that whenever he was no longer around.

The lights that pass by the glass windows emit a different unfamiliar feeling.

The tiles felt colder beneath her feet despite the carpet.

The silence was just too deafening.

The more people that inhabits the place, the more stranger they get

And the more she realizes all of this, the more she yearns to be with him.

But this was probably the last thing that could happen right now…

"_Okay, so would you mind telling me the reason why you traveled a hundred miles from space just so you could get here?"_

"_Athrun, can I stay at your place for a while"_

And that's the story of a supposedly fine morning, screwed up by a knock on his door.

All in all it gave her that weird feeling inside, it wasn't fine but it's not something to nag about. For Pete's sake it was awkward enough that he accused himself of peeping at her legs when it was her fault from the beginning wearing a man's clothes during the aftermath of it all. She knew that they would have to talk and the guy needs a friend more than ever, so even though she hates the idea, she concluded her little field trip and went back home, which felt less of a home when her husband's not even around.

And speaking of mornings…

"Where have you been?"

_I killed myself and went back just so I could answer your question and check if you've had breakfast already_

"Kisaka, why are you here?"

"Just answer the question, Cagalli"

He looked straight in her eyes. Waiting for answer

One that he prefers.

But she refuses to say so.

"I'm not a child. I' m here in front you, aren't I? I got home safe. I don't know if there is anything more to talk about."

She walked passed him. Denying him the opportunity to make her vulnerable to his bent teachings

Her steps moving forward, pretending to be unaffected, eager to get away from him.

But then, he refuses to let her go. And not even facing him, she knew that her morning was not the only thing that would start.

"I heard you cancelled another meeting with Roy Meitner"

"…"

"Why I ask me when you already know?"

"I'm not asking-"

"Then why do you care so much?" she cut his words with her own as she faced him, unwilling to back down from something he insinuated. His eyes were looking straight at her. She can sense him trying to take control of her life, of what she would do and who should she be with and that made her sick to her very gut, realizing that she was now facing an entity who she never thought would become as he is right now, at this very moment, far from being a father, he was a stranger.

"Sooner or later, you have to give up you silly relationship with that coordinator"

"…"

"Did the person you hired to investigate about my life, also predicted that for you?"

At first it was just the seriousness and the sarcasm but…

"Cagalli, that's enough!"

"And who are you to tell me that!"

The shouts and the argument came along.

She answered back returning the same coldness and appalling statement back to its source. Ever since the man in front of her did what she never knew he was able to, Cagalli suddenly found herself being unable to forgive him. The guilt was eating her inside, not being able to, especially when the man became her guardian ever since the death of her father. But she could never do it, no matter how hard she tried and everything changed since then…

"I care about you, Cagalli"

"Really? Did you? Then look at me, do I look grateful to you right now?"

"Cagalli, he doesn't even belong here and he doesn't deserve you either"

"And who are you to say that?!"

Her blood was boiling with anger. She could feel every bounding pulse waiting to explode from her veins. She was so mad at him that tears reappeared without her sensing them. They were not the only ones that were on that hallway and she wasn't even near her room, but the people took it upon themselves to clear the area. Everyone present took notice of them, but both neither of them cared.

"You wanted to control me. You even threatened me. Suddenly the person I knew you once were disappeared."

"Cagalli, stop being this way."

"Huh? Me?"

"End it, before the both of you gets hurt any further…"

"How can you say that? Why of all people, are you the one saying now huh?!"

"Cagalli, he's not the reason why you exist"

"The future of a nation rests in your hands; do you understand what you're putting at stake?"

He had the same face, same voice, same physique, but he was different now for the only reason that, he was now capable of making her cry. She wanted to save him from her own anger. She wanted to tell herself that he really cared for her and he was doing what he believes was right. She did, so many times, even though it will also make her remember the pain it bear. But nothing could ever matter now, for it was so clear to her, that what he wants is something that she despises the most.

…

"_Hey, Athrun, care to answer a question?"_

"_Hmm…what?"_

"_What if I fall in love with another person?"_

_She could still remember his face back then and it was all too funny to remember. She was just curious of what will be his reaction and his eyes sure opened wide upon hearing her words. It was the third day after she officially became his wife. She wanted to spend the whole day with him, as the both of them sat at a bench in a park. Of course she was forced to wear a dress and a wig but it didn't really matter, if that's what it will take to be with him._

"_!"_

"_Don't look at me like that! It was just a question"_

_But as his face turned back to the calmer one that he usually, it was not her turn to be caught off guard_

"_I'll let you go."_

"_Huh?"_

"_If that's what you want. Married or not, I'll set you free"_

_She suddenly thought he didn't even care. At first she wanted to smack some senses in him and walk out. So he won't even fight for her and as she looked at him straight in the face, his face was proof enough that he was serious and she was also dead serious on finding out _

"_Why?"_

…

"He's a coordinator and there is nothing you can do about it. What you feel right now is demented. Stop using these emotions so that you could make him stay here. Stop being selfish and do what you have to do. Protect Orb."

"But I don't want that anymore!"

"What did you say? Do you even hear yourself! Huh, Cagalli!"

Suddenly his hands was gripping on both side of her arms, her answers cause his emotions to stir and his hands were clutching on her flesh so tight she couldn't break free. It was a stab of a word for the both of them. She also couldn't believe what she said and that it was the truth.

"To sacrifice the happiness of one, just so everyone could attain their own happiness, is that all I am to you?!"

From the beginning, she was just a toy for them? A sacrifice? For once it all came crashing down on her. Happy endings weren't really fond of her and she felt so stupid not to realize that sooner.

"Cagalli, you'll soon understand…"

"It's you who doesn't understand a thing about Athrun..."

"Cagalli, that man is the son of Patrick Zala, can't you see?"

"What now?!"

"What am I suppose to understand? That I'm a tool so that the people could live a more fulfilling life? So that someone else could be free? I knew that, it's not like I have choice but I could even accept that without a single question. But the situations different now! I can't marry Roy Meitner or any other man because Athrun and I, we're-"

"Cagalli"

Her words came to halt. Suddenly two pairs of eyes were no longer looking at each other and Cagalli felt his arms grow weak, as he finally let her go.

"Myrna"

"Lunch is ready"

That was how their conversation had concluded. Kisaka took his leave and Cagalli was left to sit down at the end of such a lengthy table fit for twelve people. Her appetite sure got all wind up. She didn't eat her breakfast but she doesn't seem to find lunch appetizing at all. Suddenly Myrna realized that she was already toying with her food, staring at blank space, remembering what had transpired earlier.

"Did I disturb you both on any way?"

"N-No, thinking about it, you did us both a favor"

"To set the distance from each other, atleast"

"He cares for you, Lady Cagalli"

"I don't know" she said putting a weak smile on her face

"Suddenly, everything feels different." But that smile faded by itself

"That shouldn't bother you so much. Kisaka he's-"

"Myrna" she refused to look at her,

The world is starting to disappear right before her eyes.

There's nothing she could hear.

A single drop from her spoon caused a stir as it went back to that bowl of soup she refused to even taste

She was looking at it, gathering up the time, the strength

And the fine bowl of liquid turned calmer, the woman beside her still waits

She looked at her, took a deep breath

…

"_Why? You told me, you like me but in the end-"_

"_I do, more than you could ever know" he held her face between his palms with so much care, making her eyes look back at his._

"_That's why I'll let you go. I want you to be happy the way you wanted it to be. If you fall in love with someone else, it means being with me will cause you pain and I love you so much for me to cause you that." His sincerity was causing her to become guilty upon asking. She shouldn't have asked and expect something funny for him to answer back. It was just a stupid question, made out of curiosity but suddenly the jokes on her._

"_What about you, what would do by then"_

"_I'll live for you and wait for that 'next time' when I could again get the chance to be the reason for your happiness"_

…

"Athrun and I are already married"

* * *

_I'M BACK! I'm so sorry for the huge delay, anyway hopefully I could keep writing this story again. Thanks for the reviews and please still support my fics. Truth is I'm not quite confident with this chapter but hopefully it would suffice for now._


	22. Closer

I don't own Gundam Seed (although I wish it was)

It's just that I was bored and wrote this story in my mind and decided to put it online. This is an AsuCaga

Fanfic and I'm writing it in a form of drabbles

I hope I could hear a lot from those who would be reading

If what I'm attempting on doing is good or bad ))

This is my first time so…

PLEASE BE KIND

###

* * *

"Is something wrong?"

Came that familiar voice on the other end of the line.

"No, everything's fine"

She responded with one familiar lie

"Cagalli…"

"It's the truth Athrun, you worry too much!"

"It's because you lie too much"

"Me? It's the same for everyone"

Then came those whispered bitter words.

…

_She watched as that same old serene face turned into a scared one. It was nothing she had seen before, maybe because it's something Myrna had never heard all this time. Bit by bit her face turned paler, her lips drier by the second. In the end, her maid's very appearance became the proof that there was nothing right about getting married. And that was what pained her the most…_

"_I beg your pardon?"_

"_Hahaha! I was just joking!"_

"_Huh?"_

"_Look at you, you're all pale! You look funny Myrna!" _

"_Oh! Thank Haumea, you gave me a heart attack"_

"_Lady Cagalli, you shouldn't joke about that. Thank Haumea we are the only ones in this room"_

_She scanned her face once again, it returned to one that was calmer, one that shows relief. She laughed to hide the truth, that inside. She was the one crying all along._

"_Hahaha! You looked weird back there"_

"_I can't help it; I thought you were saying the truth"_

"_And what if it was the truth?" _

_She was still laughing, at how stupid she was, for even thinking a tad bit that there was someone who would understand. But the more she pursues the topic, the more that it makes her bleed._

"_Lady Cagalli, that's-"_

"_What?"_

"_You know that I won't do anything to stop your relationship but-"_

"_Oh Never mind! I was just curious; don't let it get to you"_

"_But lady Cagalli, your lunch"_

"_I want to rest for awhile, just send them to my room"_

_In the end, there was nothing to do but excuse herself. When she asked Myrna about it, her maid didn't know what to say. Maybe she doesn't want to hurt her. But what she didn't know was that the more that her words become a blur, the more that Cagalli sees clearly that there was nothing to approve of about their marriage. _

…

She was getting tired of it all. About how people would always have a lot to say when others don't conform to the norms. The say that you get married, you get to have your happy ending. But something feels different now that is one, happiness seems too far behind and the end seems to be the beginning.

"What?"

"I said, isn't it the same for everyone? Everybody lies, they do it in different ways but they're only protecting one thing. Themselves!"

"Where is this going?"

"Can you blame me for it? If I told you that I'm not okay you would worry. When I told Myrna the truth she wasn't happy either"

"It doesn't matter if she's not happy about it"

"That's not the topic! What I'm being upset about is that when I tell the truth no one's happy about it!"

"Cagalli-"

"We had an argument, me and Kisaka" she blurted out.

_Seriously, a lot of women nowadays seem to be ungrateful…_

"What?!"

_When their husbands choose to be a human punch bag for their sake. _

_That was how he had been during their whole conversation... she was ranting and he was accepting all of it. He knows that she's not really the calm princess everybody sees outside and Of course, he understands. He grew accustomed to being by her side, being the calmer one, one who's sane enough. But there will be times, that no matter how hard you try and think, the heart would be so distracting, that it acts as if it's the only working organ in your body._

_And even soldiers aren't exception to that_

"He wanted me to arrange another meeting with Roy"

"W-What did you tell him?"

She knows he was already panicking, twenty minutes have passed already but she still wasn't herself. It's no use if she hides it from him, after all, he would still know. He would do something that she knows. Their conversation was more of sighs that words, that's because she couldn't really find the words that would make them both feel at ease.

"Of course, I rejected him. What is there to say?"

"Cagalli"

"…"

"…"

"What?"

"Believe in me"

"Huh?"

"There will be times like this...when we begin to doubt"

He knew it all along.

Even though she doesn't say anything, He knows.

It's amazing how his words could make the burdens become lighter and could make her chuckle a little.

"Haha, what are you, a fortune-teller?"

"No, I'm your husband, remember?"

"Yeah, how could I forget?"

"Cagalli"

"Hmm…"

"We'll be fine. You just have to put more faith in me"

"Why? Do you have a plan already?"

"No, I don't" And he would just casually blurt out something embarrassing.

"…"

"Hey are you laughing at me?"

"Haha, No, it's just that you- okay I will"

"I trust you more than anyone, even though you have a knack for self-destructing Gundams with you inside it"

"Hey, you're the one who joined a resistance group on a desert"

"And you're the one who tried to kill me"

"Hey! I thought we-…I'm sorry for that"

"Hahaha, stupid, do you think I'll really blame you for that"

Each word, forms a sentence, each sentence now becomes the very foundation of how she could put a smile on her face. They had been talking for an hour now, and still counting. It was because for the simple reason that both of them doesn't want to hang up, each wants to hear the other speak. The topics they speak aren't even serious. Some of it were pure idiosyncrasies. But it was all worth it, if it could buy the time to hear each other more.

"How can you say that?!"

"Hahaha! And speaking of Dearka, I have to tell you he's staying at my unit for awhile"

"Oh! Is there a problem?"

"I believe it's about Miriallia"

"What about her? Are they having problems?"

"I still don't know yet"

*Sigh*

"It's can't helped. Your friend needs you"

"Yeah"

*sigh*

"…"

"Hey, why do you sound so upset?"

"Me? No-not really it's just that we can't be together during weekends anymore and-"

_With cheeks as red as those famed cherries_

"I'll still go!"

_Stuttering and continuously…stuttering_

"Huh?"

_Eyes that seemed lost on where to focus_

"I-I'll still visit even though…he's there"

"W-why?"

_And a few more stupid questions_

"W-hy? Because…I'll miss you if I don't"

She hangs up, with better words than that of goodbye

Things have been weird since she changed her status secretly. Surely, casual yet problematic days still linger but they feel lighter when she's with him. Once again she went out in the hallway and saw some of the maids meticulously cleaning each corner of the corridor. They were no longer strangers in her made up doll house. She felt she could go on, with days as heavy as this one. Head on she would face them starting with

This one…

"Lady, Cagalli, you have a visitor waiting for you"

"Who?"

"Cagalli!"

"Mi-Miriallia?"

...

...

And the days go by…

* * *

This chap seems to be lighter than I expected. Hahaha. I'm not a person who likes drama; I prefer light stories that touches life. I like creating phone conversations between friends and people who love each other, preferably because when I feel bad I also call one of my closest . Anyway please do enjoy READING and do take some time to REVIEW. TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK OKAY )))


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